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I'm a bit dense- can someone explain this one to me?
A play on some outdated Euro-trash boy band song.
A play on some outdated Euro-trash boy band song.
Don't be talking bad about the lads there cablebandit......just Let it Be. :D
A play on some outdated Euro-trash boy band song.
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just...wrong...
Tonight I'm drinking the "Official Beer of the You Laugh, You Lose" thread...
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([url]http://s107.photobucket.com/user/endo8/media/20131128_204954_zpsa1bf22a4.jpg.html[/url])
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A couple of coworkers are going through that with their teenage sons. One is in denial, the other knows. :lol:
So Sunday the temps got up into the 60's and a buddy of mine stops by with his sports bike and twisted my arm to go for a ride even though i had a hundred other things to do. He's got one of those tank bags that has a little zippered pouch on the top that holds a GPS. His gut is so big it hangs over it and he has to pull over to read it anyway. As i was leaving the little woman came out and asked me to drop off a bag of clothes at our daughter's house and she put it in my saddlebags. We were up over the border in New York when we stopped to figure out where we were and three teen age girls came over to look at our bikes. They had no idea of the address we wanted and started to walk away. My buddy couldn't get the zipper to open up the GPS pouch and instead pointed down at the unit that was too damn near his crotch and said "Come here I want to show you something." They left in a hurry and we did too. We weren't too far up the road when the local cops pulled us over and as we were explaining what had happened they found the bag of my granddaughters underwear in my saddlebags.
Needless to say i won't be riding with him for awhile
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:lol:
Funny because i always know when the guy across the street is dumping the recycling bin by the sound of all the bottles.
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[url]http://youtu.be/FLZ8L6SZmaA[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/FLZ8L6SZmaA[/url])
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I had to send that to fellow staff- we went through this whole dress code issue with the 8th grade class we had last year. :rolf:
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This is golden - NSFW language.
The First Honest Cable Company ([url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ilMx7k7mso#ws[/url])
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[url]http://wichita.craigslist.org/mcy/4268116764.html[/url] ([url]http://wichita.craigslist.org/mcy/4268116764.html[/url])
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I still want it.
Safety Warning
Consumption of some sugar-free candies may cause stomach discomfort and/or a laxative effect. Individual tolerance will vary. If this is the first time you’ve tried these candies, we recommend beginning with one-fourth of a serving size or less. Made with Lycasin, a sugar alcohol. As with other sugar alcohols, people sensitive to this substance may experience upset stomachs.
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For the Grammar Nazis.
I have a Peanut Butter and Jelly most days for lunch at work. Adam's Peanut Butter. Smucker's Raspberry. I get the occasional "do you have a PB&J _every_ day?" when I'm in the snack room. No, no I don't have one every day. But it is my default lunch.
So today:
Her: "Why do you have a PB&J every day?"
Me: "Why do folks stay married for 20 years?"
Her: " :o That's not the same thing. You're dealing with another person."
Me: "Yea, with a PB&J, I know what I'm getting every single time."
:D
Carl
I have a Peanut Butter and Jelly most days for lunch at work. Adam's Peanut Butter. Smucker's Raspberry. I get the occasional "do you have a PB&J _every_ day?" when I'm in the snack room. No, no I don't have one every day. But it is my default lunch.
So today:
Her: "Why do you have a PB&J every day?"
Me: "Why do folks stay married for 20 years?"
Her: " :o That's not the same thing. You're dealing with another person."
Me: "Yea, with a PB&J, I know what I'm getting every single time."
:D
Carl
So was that a joke, or were you just sharing? 8)
I have a Peanut Butter and Jelly most days for lunch at work. Adam's Peanut Butter. Smucker's Raspberry. I get the occasional "do you have a PB&J _every_ day?" when I'm in the snack room. No, no I don't have one every day. But it is my default lunch.
So today:
Her: "Why do you have a PB&J every day?"
Me: "Why do folks stay married for 20 years?"
Her: " :o That's not the same thing. You're dealing with another person."
Me: "Yea, with a PB&J, I know what I'm getting every single time."
:D
Carl
So was that a joke, or were you just sharing? 8)
I have a Peanut Butter and Jelly most days for lunch at work. Adam's Peanut Butter. Smucker's Raspberry. I get the occasional "do you have a PB&J _every_ day?" when I'm in the snack room. No, no I don't have one every day. But it is my default lunch.
So today:
Her: "Why do you have a PB&J every day?"
Me: "Why do folks stay married for 20 years?"
Her: " :o That's not the same thing. You're dealing with another person."
Me: "Yea, with a PB&J, I know what I'm getting every single time."
:D
Carl
So was that a joke, or were you just sharing? 8)
His other post had me thinking there was more "change" in the "other" department...
[url]https://www.sport-touring.org/index.php?topic=743.msg18107#msg18107[/url] ([url]https://www.sport-touring.org/index.php?topic=743.msg18107#msg18107[/url])
I have a Peanut Butter and Jelly most days for lunch at work. Adam's Peanut Butter. Smucker's Raspberry. I get the occasional "do you have a PB&J _every_ day?" when I'm in the snack room. No, no I don't have one every day. But it is my default lunch.
So today:
Her: "Why do you have a PB&J every day?"
Me: "Why do folks stay married for 20 years?"
Her: " :o That's not the same thing. You're dealing with another person."
Me: "Yea, with a PB&J, I know what I'm getting every single time."
:D
Carl
So was that a joke, or were you just sharing? 8)
I just thought it was funny.
Carl
Prank on a kid who's never seen a laser before. :lol:
[url=http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=34f_1391558494]www.liveleak.com/view?i=34f_1391558494[/url] ([url]http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=34f_1391558494[/url])
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Genius.
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Genius.
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Genius.
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So true.
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So true.
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This is one of the most awesome things I've seen this year. And I remember when it was true for me. I miss it.
LT
How many of you have really seen the milky way?
How about the southern cross?
Staring up at them in the night sky in the middle of an African desert while hearing lions call out is a memory etched in my mind.
Would have been better if the last name was "Diddler".
Out at cat curling.
Sent through subspace from the U.S.S. Enterprise.
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Genius.
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How To Troll A Dating Website
[url]http://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&f=210&t=1017090&mid=0&i=0&nmt=How+to+troll+a+dating+website[/url] ([url]http://www.pistonheads.com/gassing/topic.asp?h=0&f=210&t=1017090&mid=0&i=0&nmt=How+to+troll+a+dating+website[/url])
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([url]http://s53.photobucket.com/user/GeneralPig/media/GeneralPig024/fayvv68_zpsab3676d2.jpg.html[/url])
Here's a personal submission:
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Here's a personal submission:
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[url]http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=2b5_1393441086[/url] ([url]http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=2b5_1393441086[/url])
I lost it at "covered in jell-o"
The risks of picking up thrash metal bands from airports.One shouldn't assume... unless it's required for you to sleep at night.
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([url]http://s53.photobucket.com/user/GeneralPig/media/GeneralPig035/comet_zpse3e624fc.jpg.html[/url])
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Is that Phteven?
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Bwaaa-haaa-haaa-ha-ha-ha
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I wish someone had told me. I have that set. :crazy:
I wish someone had told me. I have that set. :crazy:
And you bug me about the truck. :bash:
I wish someone had told me. I have that set. :crazy:
And you bug me about the truck. :bash:
I wish someone had told me. I have that set. :crazy:
And you bug me about the truck. :bash:
You drove a truck into your penis?!? :wow:
Well, I don't mean to brag... :bigsmile:
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Out - and I miss that show - it was pretty damn funny - sometimes!
Beginning of "Also sprach Zarathustra" by Richard Strauss, performed by the Portsmouth Sinfonia.
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([url]http://s53.photobucket.com/user/GeneralPig/media/GeneralPig067/jacksonhobbit_zpsf2120e28.jpg.html[/url])
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For. The. Win.
:clap: :rolf:
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For. The. Win.
:clap: :rolf:
Absolutely. Fucking. Brilliant!
I want to be at that wedding!
For. The. Win.
:clap: :rolf:
Absolutely. Fucking. Brilliant!
I want to be at that wedding!
Say you're in the band. :bigok:
I live just outside DC and have a drum set. Any bassists, guitarists, sitarists, or kazooists on here wanna play a gig? Open bar and no pay will take me back to my gigging days for sure.
I live just outside DC and have a drum set. Any bassists, guitarists, sitarists, or kazooists on here wanna play a gig? Open bar and no pay will take me back to my gigging days for sure.
You know what? Yeah, I'll do it. For that glorious clusterfuck I'll even sing lead.
I live just outside DC and have a drum set. Any bassists, guitarists, sitarists, or kazooists on here wanna play a gig? Open bar and no pay will take me back to my gigging days for sure.
You know what? Yeah, I'll do it. For that glorious clusterfuck I'll even sing lead.
Dig it.
Set list? I suggest:
1. Don't Stop (since we don't have a keyboard player, I'll "sing" the piano vamp)
2. Freebird.
3. Drum Solo (natural follow-up to Freebird, and this will give you a break after playing the dual guitar solo on bass)--I'll only take 20 or 25 minutes
4. Music of "Don't Stop" with lyrics of "Freebird"
5. Music of "Freebird" with lyrics of "Don't Stop"
6. Stairway to Heaven (a capella?)
7. Bass solo
9. Medley: Wynona's Big Brown Beaver/I'm Too Sexy/Louie Louie--vamp until the power is cut
The add is from 2012...wonder what happened at that wedding?
The add is from 2012...wonder what happened at that wedding?
I can only hope it was as epic as I'd like to imagine.
[url]http://youtu.be/mg6xD9Jolyc[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/mg6xD9Jolyc[/url])
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[url]http://jxn.craigslist.org/rnr/4479193400.html[/url] ([url]http://jxn.craigslist.org/rnr/4479193400.html[/url])
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([url]http://s53.photobucket.com/user/GeneralPig/media/GeneralPig070/eire_zps47c58bdf.jpg.html[/url])
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Out!
Now I know what I'm bringing to the Cat-Be-Que. :rolf:
QuoteOut!
Now I know what I'm bringing to the Cat-Be-Que. :rolf:
Yes!!!
QuoteOut!
Now I know what I'm bringing to the Cat-Be-Que. :rolf:
Yes!!!
With matching dickerdoodles?
Sent through subspace from the U.S.S. Enterprise.
QuoteOut!
Now I know what I'm bringing to the Cat-Be-Que. :rolf:
Yes!!!
With matching dickerdoodles?
Sent through subspace from the U.S.S. Enterprise.
Nah, there'd have to be a "brownie" with lady fingers stuck in them. :o
:D
Carl
Out big time at penis enlarger.
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CoP - Cactus Body Slam ([url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHSJCMkUa9Y#ws[/url])
Could have been worse, he could have sexually assaulted a porcupine.
The All New Electric Harley-Davidson ([url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UdaEX5jh5Lk#ws[/url])
Think about it...there's coffee on my computer screen once it hit me.
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[url]http://stlouis.craigslist.org/tls/4535596079.html[/url] ([url]http://stlouis.craigslist.org/tls/4535596079.html[/url])
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Bwahahaha!I thought of you when I posted those. :bigok:
Out.
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Always one of my faves.
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Always one of my faves.
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What am I missing?
Its not a boot?
Here's the original post, since OP deleted it (I guess because he got tired of his inbox filling up with people accusing him of lying).
So a while ago I had decided to treat myself and go to Burger King. I hadn't had the greatest of days and I had a headache coming on. It was a very long line and I was at the end of it waiting patiently. When behind me comes this woman yapping on her cellphone with a little monster of a child. This kid was out of control, screaming, punching his mother throwing around a gameboy whenever something didn't go right in the game. The mother didn't seem to pay any attention to him and his continued yelling of 'I want a Fucking PIE'. After about 5 minutes of the line with these people behind me, I had gone from a headache to a full on migraine, but nothing was going to stop me from getting those burgers. I calmly turn and ask her nicely if she can please calm or quiet her child down. Immediately she gets up in my face telling me I can't tell her nothing about raising her child and to mind my own business. I nod and turn around, shes still yelling at the back of my head when the child cries out again how he wants a pie, the mother consoles him, calling him sweety and ensuring they'll get pies for lunch because she loves him so much. Things immediately go back to the they were and I wait another 5 minutes before getting to the front of the line. It turns out it was so slow because they had 1 trainee on cash during the lunch hour rush. All I can think of is how the people behind me ruined my splurge and gave me this headache. I then decide to ruin their day. I order every pie they have left in addition to my burgers. Turned out to be 23 pies in total, I take my order and walk towards the exit. Moments later I hear the woman yelling, what do you mean you don't have any pies left, who bought them all? I turn around and see the cashier pointing me out with the woman shooting me a death glare. I stand there and pull out a pie and slowly start eating eat as I stare back at her. She starts running towards me but can't get to me because of other lineups in the food court. I turn and slowly walk away.
5.0 out of 5 stars In some ways, the G-Shock sucks, August 19, 2025
By Wintertiger - See all my reviews
This review is from: Casio Men's DW5600E-1V "G-Shock" Classic Digital Watch (Watch)
This watch is really lousy at many things.
Women will not fantasize about how big and hard your wallet is when they see the G-Shock. It looks terrible with a leisure suit, and worse with a tuxedo. Donald Trump would mot be caught dead with one. It will not impress anyone at a power meeting in a corporate board room. Really does not go with the outfit if you are a male stripper with Chippendale's or a clown with Barnum and Bailey.
The G-Shock does have a few minor benefits. Mine has been deeper than 300' repeatedly with me on deep techical dives, working flawlessly. I never got deep enough for the pressure to kill it, and I have been deep. Indeed, before reliable dive computers were developed, the G-Shock was favored by the deep and cave diving pioneers because it actually kept working at extreme depths, unlike a lot of big name watches that were supposed to. So this thing will put up with far more water than most watches, regardless of price.
And there is also the tiny benefit of shock resistance, but is that just slick advertising? Well, years ago when I was a lot younger, my buddies and I would get the idea that we should torture-test the watch to see if it was really shock resistant. There may have been quite a bit of beer involved, but I have no clear recollection of that. It survived falls off off 6-story buildings (okay, it was forcefully thrown downwards from those heights after the first couple falls). My friend with the pitcher's arm threw it out the window of a speeding car as hard as he could, hitting traffic signs. Over cliffs, over whatever. The case would be ragged, but the watch would keep running fine . . . UNLESS something hard and pointed went through the glass face. That was the only thing that would do in the watch, and it was not easy to have that happen.
We ran over it a few times with the car, which jacked up the band but didn't phase the module.
It did totally fail when shot with a .22, though the back of the case could withstand all air rifles. Yeah, we wasted some money on the 5 or 6 watches we did in over the years trying to find what the limits were, but the beer cost more.
Basically, this watch will survive depths and impacts far worse than you could ever possible survive. Which is another failure for the watch: the coroner will not get a good time of death from your watch because it won't stop like everyone elses when your plane crashes. He might even steal it because he is so impress that it survived . . . and he doesn't have to worry about the water hurting it as he washes your blood and gore off the watch.
But it still won't make women think you have a lot of money.
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I think that's the first pic in the random pic thread on the old place which shall not be named.
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([url]http://imageshack.us[/url])
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I think that's the first pic in the random pic thread on the old place which shall not be named.I think it was the "part of chart that looks like Pac-Man" one. They're both oldies but goodies.
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I think that's the first pic in the random pic thread on the old place which shall not be named.
Spelling. Knowing how to spell grammar.
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There is some amusing stuff there at lamebook.com.Damm, blocked at work...
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I save things...............
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'least he got stickers. :(
SO...SOOOOO...WAY FAR OUT!!! :rolf:
And I'm probably going to hell for it. :shrug:
Out!
Sent through subspace from the U.S.S. Enterprise.
?
srsly... Bogdan???
srsly... Bogdan???
IKR??srsly... Bogdan???
And what kind of name is Sharon?
And what kind of name is Sharon?
And what kind of name is Sharon?
A name that I, unfortunately, can now only hear in Ozzy's plaintive yowl.
I still think Carl needs to pull up his pants.Lay on the couch and tell us why that bothers you so much...
I still think Carl needs to pull up his pants.Lay on the couch and tell us why that bothers you so much...
I still think Carl needs to pull up his pants.Lay on the couch and tell us why that bothers you so much...
He wasn't breast fed long enough.
:rolf: especially since my FB feed blew up with that today.
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You mean, like, from the toilet?
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You mean, like, from the toilet?
Out. And Rick-rolled. :D
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Admit it- we all knew this was true.
every person who has ever been monarch of our glorious country is dead except for our current Queen.
but every person who has ever been monarch of our glorious country is dead except for our current Queen. [/i]
but every person who has ever been monarch of our glorious country is dead except for our current Queen. [/i]
Shouldn't MI5 or Scotland Yard be looking into this?
I told her no, I had stopped to pee on a fire hydrant and a car hit me.
Same thing happened to my Uncle when he went on the Purina diet. Except he ended up in the ICU because he fell off the couch while he was licking his balls.
Same thing happened to my Uncle when he went on the Purina diet. Except he ended up in the ICU because he fell off the couch while he was licking his balls.
How does one start this diet? :bigsmile:
Don't forget the Adam's Apple...Same thing happened to my Uncle when he went on the Purina diet. Except he ended up in the ICU because he fell off the couch while he was licking his balls.
How does one start this diet? :bigsmile:
I think you need to have some ribs removed.
Don't forget the Adam's Apple...Same thing happened to my Uncle when he went on the Purina diet. Except he ended up in the ICU because he fell off the couch while he was licking his balls.
How does one start this diet? :bigsmile:
I think you need to have some ribs removed.
Yesterday I was at The Store buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Owen , the Wonder Dog.
I was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had an elephant?
So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward. I had tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete (certified), so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I had stopped to pee on a fire hydrant and a car hit me.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.
I have waaaay to much time to think these up...
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McCain Urges Military Strikes Against FIFA
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) – Calling the Obama Administration’s actions against the soccer organization “weak and ineffective,” Senator John McCain on Thursday proposed military action to “dismantle and destroy FIFA once and for all.”
“These are people who only understand one thing: force,” McCain said on the floor of the United States Senate. “We must make FIFA taste the vengeful might and fury of the United States military.”
McCain said that he was “completely unimpressed” by the Department of Justice’s arrests of several top FIFA lieutenants this week, calling the action “the kind of Band-Aid solution that this Administration, sadly, has become famous for.”
“Rounding up a few flunkies in a hotel is meaningless when the leader of FIFA remains at large,” he said. “I will follow Sepp Blatter to the gates of Hell.”
McCain requested a four-billion-dollar aid package for moderate elements within global soccer, and said that the United States should be prepared to put boots on the ground in Switzerland.
Calling the use of force against FIFA “long overdue,” he placed the blame for the group’s alarming growth squarely on the shoulders of the White House. “Barack Obama created FIFA,” he said.
[url]http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/mccain-urges-military-strikes-against-fifa[/url] ([url]http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/mccain-urges-military-strikes-against-fifa[/url])
What's FIFA?
(o\_!_/o)
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I'm glad there isn't anyone else in the office. That dog brain freeze picture had me laughing out loud, which I almost never do.
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Someone's gonna have to splain this to me. Isnot funny. Stupid, not funny.
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(o\_!_/o)
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Way out.
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Here's the original thread on mustangforums:
[url]http://mustangforums.com/forum/5-0l-general-discussion/368307-i-m-done-with-this-car.html[/url] ([url]http://mustangforums.com/forum/5-0l-general-discussion/368307-i-m-done-with-this-car.html[/url])
Here's the original thread on mustangforums:
[url]http://mustangforums.com/forum/5-0l-general-discussion/368307-i-m-done-with-this-car.html[/url] ([url]http://mustangforums.com/forum/5-0l-general-discussion/368307-i-m-done-with-this-car.html[/url])
25 Pages!! We could take notes from them
Here's the original thread on mustangforums:
[url]http://mustangforums.com/forum/5-0l-general-discussion/368307-i-m-done-with-this-car.html[/url] ([url]http://mustangforums.com/forum/5-0l-general-discussion/368307-i-m-done-with-this-car.html[/url])
25 Pages!! We could take notes from them
HAS TO be a troll.
Ppfffft. Amateurs. 42 pages and 11 years in the making..A troll with a long-term strategy... very very sneaky.
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[url]http://youtu.be/BmUPYOueKt4[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/BmUPYOueKt4[/url])
I had to look up Jade helm. All I can do is shake my head and remember to avoid Texass.
[url]http://youtu.be/BmUPYOueKt4[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/BmUPYOueKt4[/url])
Damn, that is my buddy Tony. :lol:
I like the kids in the back rolling their wide, sad eyes.
[url]http://youtu.be/BmUPYOueKt4[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/BmUPYOueKt4[/url])
[url]http://youtu.be/BmUPYOueKt4[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/BmUPYOueKt4[/url])
I'm pretty sure that's my friend Tony. :willy: :rolf:
Damn, that is my buddy Tony. :lol:
I like the kids in the back rolling their wide, sad eyes.
Canadian soldier indeed. He wrote it on the worng part. :bigsmile:
The bullet is the actual projectile. The cartridge is the entire unit needed for the bullet to become a projectile. It's OK you're from Canuckstan* no one expects you to understand firearms like an American.
No they didn't. Canadians insert the bullets manually.
The ENTIRE bullet.
Out at granny and CAH.
Sent through subspace from the U.S.S. Enterprise.
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I was visiting my DAUGHTER last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper.
"This is the 21st century" she said. "We don't waste money on newspapers.
"Here, use my iPad."
I can tell you this... that fly never knew what hit him...
Wtf
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In my local area.
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Shatner just saw Ford's pay check?
Waterboarding at Guantanamo Bay sounds super rad if you don’t know what either of those things are.
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It's reasons like this that I don't have a Facebook account. I'd find myself unable to contain my urges, and would be somewhat unpopular.
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I would find myself with a sharpie in my hand, and unable to stop what some people would call vandalism.
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In and out
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([url]http://s53.photobucket.com/user/GeneralPig/media/zQWCOsS_zps2e0dnxp2.jpg.html[/url])
NSFWWhat language is that?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SentQjMIioY (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SentQjMIioY)
[url]http://youtu.be/P2fXTf2hcoA[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/P2fXTf2hcoA[/url])
Please take this opportunity to have a conversation with T______ about making Christ-like choices...How could we possibly know that Christ never pantsed anybody?
:pope:Please take this opportunity to have a conversation with T______ about making Christ-like choices...How could we possibly know that Christ never pantsed anybody?
:pope:Please take this opportunity to have a conversation with T______ about making Christ-like choices...How could we possibly know that Christ never pantsed anybody?
Robes.
[url]http://youtu.be/nU5cMZymSr0[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/nU5cMZymSr0[/url])
[url]http://youtu.be/nU5cMZymSr0[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/nU5cMZymSr0[/url])
I'm with the bear, what an annoying woman.
[url]http://youtu.be/B00grl3K01g[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/B00grl3K01g[/url])
.
Out! Though I dispute the part about camping being bad for conception.
.
Out! Though I dispute the part about camping being bad for conception.
Out and done.
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! No longer available ([url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e59guruVL4o#[/url])
^ I must find those.
Double post because.
[url]http://now8news.com/jimmy-dean-sausage-in-walmart-bathroom/[/url] ([url]http://now8news.com/jimmy-dean-sausage-in-walmart-bathroom/[/url])
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:lol:
Out.
Double post because.
[url]http://now8news.com/jimmy-dean-sausage-in-walmart-bathroom/[/url] ([url]http://now8news.com/jimmy-dean-sausage-in-walmart-bathroom/[/url])
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Double post because.
[url]http://now8news.com/jimmy-dean-sausage-in-walmart-bathroom/[/url] ([url]http://now8news.com/jimmy-dean-sausage-in-walmart-bathroom/[/url])
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Turns out this is a FAKE story but the picture of the lady has to be legit.
I've seen the pic. Where's the 'lady' you're referring to?@!?Double post because.
[url]http://now8news.com/jimmy-dean-sausage-in-walmart-bathroom/[/url] ([url]http://now8news.com/jimmy-dean-sausage-in-walmart-bathroom/[/url])
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Turns out this is a FAKE story but the picture of the lady has to be legit.
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Tolstoy - a real renaissance man.
I'm not sure why this made me laugh, but it did.
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So out!!! :rolf:
[url]http://youtu.be/PmcGwBjL7W0[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/PmcGwBjL7W0[/url])
BWAHAHA
Why does that happen?
I mean I think I'd understand if my response was "well, if you dildo your mags with an old trans dude, they'll guard you pretty good, but other than that I'd replace the RSA".
But this must be the same thing that causes the "YZF600 for sale" thread to have an image of girls in short shorts, which I've scanned the thread to find without success.
Does anyone have an actual explanation?
BWAHAHA
Why does that happen?
I mean I think I'd understand if my response was "well, if you dildo your mags with an old trans dude, they'll guard you pretty good, but other than that I'd replace the RSA".
But this must be the same thing that causes the "YZF600 for sale" thread to have an image of girls in short shorts, which I've scanned the thread to find without success.
Does anyone have an actual explanation?
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I need that on explained. 24 Ohm?
You can thank the troops Clay.
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Ride the Tail of the Dragon
Third time is a charm! This will be our third year in a row visiting beautiful Maggie Valley, The Tail of The Dragon, and Wheels Through Time. Are you biker enough to make the 9 hr ride to Maggie Valley or are you just a bar hopper? We will be finalizing plans in March, probably renting a coupe cabins (depending on participation) collecting deposits, etc...
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I apologize in advance for all of our lovely ladies that I am about to offend- but I about busted a nut at this one. My whole family wanted to know what I was laoughing at:
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I was at a meeting last night and a new guy walked through puffing away on a nasty smelling vaporizer.
I have my own opinion of these things and the people whose lives revolve around them so when the guy I was BS-ing with referred to it as a "douche flute", I literally laughed out loud with a snort.
Douche flute.
Douche flute, douche flute, douche flute. :lol:
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As you may be able to tell by the link, nsfw.
[url]http://www.banggood.com/10-Functions-Wireless-Control-Vibrator-C-String-Invisible-Vibrating-Underwear-p-986323.html[/url] ([url]http://www.banggood.com/10-Functions-Wireless-Control-Vibrator-C-String-Invisible-Vibrating-Underwear-p-986323.html[/url])
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Gotta be from the Onion. Right?
PS. How many college football players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Just one, but he gets six Engineering credits for it.
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:rolf: I love stoners. :bigok:+1. Dude.
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Chain installers? Is that really a thing? :o
Permits available to become chain installers
STOCKTON — Individuals interested in becoming chain installers on California State Highways in the Sierra Nevada can contact the Caltrans Maintenance Office at (209) 736-0187. Permits are available for State Highways 4, 88, 89, 108 and 207 in Calaveras, Alpine, Amador and Tuolumne counties.
All new applicants are required to attend an orientation class, which will be held Oct. 23 at 10 a.m. in the Caltrans Maintenance Office (98 South Main St.) in Angels Camp. A written and performance exam will be held immediately following the orientation. Successful applicants may purchase their permits immediately after the exam.
Returning chain installers with no violations are not required to attend the orientation and may purchase their 2014/2015 permit from the Caltrans Maintenance Office in Angels Camp. Call (209) 736-0187 to schedule an appointment.
The cost for the permit and identification bib is $200. Calaveras County requires a business license for all applicants interested in working on Highway 4. The Calaveras County Tax Collector’s Office is located in the Government Center in San Andreas.
Chain installers? Is that really a thing? :o
This is fun.
[url]http://trumpdonald.org/[/url] ([url]http://trumpdonald.org/[/url])
This is fun.
[url]http://trumpdonald.org/[/url] ([url]http://trumpdonald.org/[/url])
Totally going to hell for this...
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I was eating breakfast with my 12-year-old Granddaughter and I asked her, "Do you know what day is tomorrow?."
She said "It's President's Day!"
She is a smart kid, so I asked "What does President's Day mean?"
I was waiting for something about Washington or Lincoln.
She replied, "President's Day is when the President steps out of the White House, and if he sees his shadow, we have another year of Bullshit."
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A friend of mine sent this to me thinking it was real.
[url]http://nationalreport.net/fbi-admits-registered-motorcycle-owners-classified-gang-list/[/url] ([url]http://nationalreport.net/fbi-admits-registered-motorcycle-owners-classified-gang-list/[/url])
A friend of mine sent this to me thinking it was real.
[url]http://nationalreport.net/fbi-admits-registered-motorcycle-owners-classified-gang-list/[/url] ([url]http://nationalreport.net/fbi-admits-registered-motorcycle-owners-classified-gang-list/[/url])
A friend of mine sent this to me thinking it was real.
[url]http://nationalreport.net/fbi-admits-registered-motorcycle-owners-classified-gang-list/[/url] ([url]http://nationalreport.net/fbi-admits-registered-motorcycle-owners-classified-gang-list/[/url])
If you're not on at least a couple government agency lists, you're not living right.
Behold the Tales of Neal:
[url]http://imgur.com/gallery/dTJWF[/url] ([url]http://imgur.com/gallery/dTJWF[/url])
This was an actual table tennis match in a tournament in 2014.
This may well have been the funniest international-level sporting event ever filmed. Really- just watch it.
Behold the Tales of Neal:
[url]http://imgur.com/gallery/dTJWF[/url] ([url]http://imgur.com/gallery/dTJWF[/url])
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I'm sorry. I don't get it. :shrug:
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I'm sorry. I don't get it. :shrug:
Remember this old game that came with Windows?
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That one should finalize me going to hell. :firedevil:
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That one should finalize me going to hell. :firedevil:
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That one should finalize me going to hell. :firedevil:
Scoot over. You're in my seat.
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That one should finalize me going to hell. :firedevil:
Scoot over. You're in my seat.
Is it hot in here?
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God I love how twisted Cyanide & Happiness is.
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Posted with The G's permission.
[url]http://youtu.be/3oCB91wsb6A[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/3oCB91wsb6A[/url])
[url]http://youtu.be/qn75DBuru34[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/qn75DBuru34[/url])
Im losing it because you're only seeing a small bit of what went on.
It's all fun and games till the anesthesia wears off.
Posted with The G's permission.
[url]http://youtu.be/3oCB91wsb6A[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/3oCB91wsb6A[/url])
[url]http://youtu.be/qn75DBuru34[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/qn75DBuru34[/url])
Im losing it because you're only seeing a small bit of what went on.
It's all fun and games till the anesthesia wears off.
I lost on that video. :lol:
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([url]http://s53.photobucket.com/user/GeneralPig/media/catscouldgrowtosizeofhorse_zpsagpgrixn.jpg.html[/url])
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Don't do it, just don't.....
L;
I get a 404 message.
Oh. So. Out!
At Batman vs Superman.
What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?
I've never had a garbanzo bean on my face
[url]http://youtu.be/z-B6CXbDAnE[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/z-B6CXbDAnE[/url])
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Some here will understand.
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Some here will understand.
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[url]http://tumblr.tastefullyoffensive.com/post/142307803873/this-should-be-a-movie-via-patrick-lenton[/url] ([url]http://tumblr.tastefullyoffensive.com/post/142307803873/this-should-be-a-movie-via-patrick-lenton[/url])
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Isn't that the truth?
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Well done boys, well done.
[url]http://youtu.be/-hVWEefD5ag[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/-hVWEefD5ag[/url])
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Not a rant but office related.
Send email to boss with a long URL. Outlook breaks the URL into two lines. Stupid Outlook.
Boss: "Your url isn't working."
Me: "You know Outlook breaks it into two lines. Just copy the second line to the first and there you go."
Boss: "..."
Me: "Fine" delete unnecessary parameters "here's a shorter URL that'll work."
---
Boss: "I want the team to send me HTML messages from now on."
Me: "Out of curiosity, why?"
Boss: "When you send plain text, I'm locked in and can't add bullets or change the color to highlight bits."
Me: "You know it's only three clicks to change from Plain Text to HTML."
Me: "Fine" set up configuration to always send html to boss but by default it's plain text
---
Boss: "Performance review time. When you do your self evaluation, I don't want to see any project work listed."
Me: "You know projects is the largest amount of work we do. It's second priority in our tasks with only server breakdowns that have a higher priority."
Boss: "Projects are Business driven. I only want success stories that help Operations."
---
It's really not ranty, just, seriously?? It is to laugh.
Carl
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[url]http://www.dailykos.com/stories/2016/5/16/1527124/-Conservative-congressional-candidate-shares-screenshot-forgets-to-close-porn-windows?detail=facebook[/url] ([url]http://www.dailykos.com/stories/2016/5/16/1527124/-Conservative-congressional-candidate-shares-screenshot-forgets-to-close-porn-windows?detail=facebook[/url])
[url]http://www.dailykos.com/stories/2016/5/16/1527124/-Conservative-congressional-candidate-shares-screenshot-forgets-to-close-porn-windows?detail=facebook[/url] ([url]http://www.dailykos.com/stories/2016/5/16/1527124/-Conservative-congressional-candidate-shares-screenshot-forgets-to-close-porn-windows?detail=facebook[/url])
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Out!
It works for physicists too.
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:headscratch: :headscratch: :headscratch: :headscratch:
Riding the penis. got it.
Ha.
https://www.theburningplatform.com/2016/06/11/oregon-citizen-is-a-genius/ (https://www.theburningplatform.com/2016/06/11/oregon-citizen-is-a-genius/)
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https://www.theburningplatform.com/2016/06/11/oregon-citizen-is-a-genius/ (https://www.theburningplatform.com/2016/06/11/oregon-citizen-is-a-genius/)
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Curiously, I don't find this funny on any level.
:wings:
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This may only be funny to those of us that have sampled the delicacy that is Durian fruit...
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This may only be funny to those of us that have sampled the delicacy that is Durian fruit...
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PS My Great Aunt Bronwen knew Hemingway. She was a colonel of ambulances at the siege of Barcelona in the Spanish Civil War. She despised him as a coward. She was up at the frontline, he was behind the lines. getting copy and remaining drunk.
PS My Great Aunt Bronwen knew Hemingway. She was a colonel of ambulances at the siege of Barcelona in the Spanish Civil War. She despised him as a coward. She was up at the frontline, he was behind the lines. getting copy and remaining drunk.
Is that part true?
The corp. I work for routinely buys companies and takes over the administration and networking. That's how I came to work for them - I would never apply for a job at a heartless and soulless conglomerate.
Someone at a new location just put in a service ticket to change all their PCs from mountain time zone to "Arizona" time zone.
:facepalm:
-rw-r--r-- 2 root root 2358 Jun 15 2015 Alaska
-rw-r--r-- 3 root root 2339 Jun 15 2015 Aleutian
-rw-r--r-- 2 root root 327 Jun 15 2015 Arizona
-rw-r--r-- 2 root root 3543 Jun 15 2015 Central
-rw-r--r-- 3 root root 3519 Jun 15 2015 Eastern
-rw-r--r-- 4 root root 1649 Jun 15 2015 East-Indiana
-rw-r--r-- 3 root root 250 Jun 15 2015 Hawaii
-rw-r--r-- 3 root root 2395 Jun 15 2015 Indiana-Starke
-rw-r--r-- 2 root root 2202 Jun 15 2015 Michigan
-rw-r--r-- 4 root root 2427 Jun 15 2015 Mountain
-rw-r--r-- 3 root root 2819 Jun 15 2015 Pacific
-rw-r--r-- 3 root root 2819 Jun 15 2015 Pacific-New
-rw-r--r-- 4 root root 250 Jun 15 2015 Samoa
OK, I lose.
There are 4 time zones in the USA.
There are multiple time zone settings for computers, for all the odd-ball locations.
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Not enough monitors.
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The corp. I work for routinely buys companies and takes over the administration and networking. That's how I came to work for them - I would never apply for a job at a heartless and soulless conglomerate.
Someone at a new location just put in a service ticket to change all their PCs from mountain time zone to "Arizona" time zone.
:facepalm:
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I still have my IBM Model M keyboard although his is a bit older than that (function keys on the left instead of the top, Ctl and Alt keys in the correct location).
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I still have my IBM Model M keyboard although his is a bit older than that (function keys on the left instead of the top, Ctl and Alt keys in the correct location).
Those old IBM mechanical keyboards go for good money. A used reconditioned one can go for around $190 and one new in the box will go for a few hundred dollars. Not bad for discarded office junk.
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I still have my IBM Model M keyboard although his is a bit older than that (function keys on the left instead of the top, Ctl and Alt keys in the correct location).
Those old IBM mechanical keyboards go for good money. A used reconditioned one can go for around $190 and one new in the box will go for a few hundred dollars. Not bad for discarded office junk.
Suck. I pitched about 8 of those last year...
I'm a fan of the model M actually and have had my 1986 one since about 1989 when I pulled it from an IBM-XT286 machine that was being discarded. Been using it pretty regularly ever since. About 9 years back, I bought a second one for about $80 from ClickyKeyboards ([url]http://www.clickeykeyboards.com/index.html[/url]). In checking the site now, both of mine are worth $190 each I guess.
Carl
I'm a fan of the model M actually and have had my 1986 one since about 1989 when I pulled it from an IBM-XT286 machine that was being discarded. Been using it pretty regularly ever since. About 9 years back, I bought a second one for about $80 from ClickyKeyboards ([url]http://www.clickeykeyboards.com/index.html[/url]). In checking the site now, both of mine are worth $190 each I guess.
Carl
I know I kicked off the fun. But I was a typesetter back in the early/mid 80's. The IBM keyboards were definitely the cat's meow. Positive stroke and never broke. Just like a Selectric. ;)
So you guys worked on one of these?
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In the late 1960s, Compugraphic introduced the 7200 and 2900 photocomposition machines. Prepared by a computer, a tape would be fed into a phototypesetter, which would imprint type from a strip of film onto Kodak-made Ektamatic (light-sensitive) paper, which would then be used for paste up. As the development of its systems progressed, Compugraphic continually included new technology such as larger CRT monitors, floppy-disk storage, and screen preview capabilities. Its most prolific product was the EditWriter, which could image onto photo paper up to 8 inches wide, could create type in sizes from 6 to 72 points by using various fixed lenses mounted on an internal turret, and stored information on 8" floppy disks.
And it's my fault.
And it's my fault.
All on Photobucket so can't see them :(
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Do not, under any circumstances, let your Roomba run over dog poop. (https://www.facebook.com/jesse.newton.37/posts/776177951574)
visitors can't see pics , please register or loginDo not, under any circumstances, let your Roomba run over dog poop. (https://www.facebook.com/jesse.newton.37/posts/776177951574)
That's some funny shit.
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I call bullshit you got that at WalMart. I've been to WalMart.Yup no way that's from walmart.
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Some people just ain't right.
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Some people just ain't right.
Some people should be banned from parenting children. What an A-hole.
Interviewer: "Any weaknesses?"
Me: "Yes, I can be quite self-defecating."
I: "Ha ha! I think you mean 'deprecating."
M: *Loudly shits pants*
Interviewer: "Any weaknesses?"
Me: "Yes, I can be quite self-defecating."
I: "Ha ha! I think you mean 'deprecating."
M: *Loudly shits pants*
Totally out. My wife asked me why I was laughing- she didn't find it nearly as funny.
Interviewer: "Any weaknesses?"
Me: "Yes, I can be quite self-defecating."
I: "Ha ha! I think you mean 'deprecating."
M: *Loudly shits pants*
Totally out. My wife asked me why I was laughing- she didn't find it nearly as funny.
When you're at the bottom of a pool with a concrete block on your foot and blowing bubbles; you don't find much humor.
PSA - Alarm Clock Warning (NSFW)
https://youtu.be/Mr4vnX55jmM
*Intentionally not embedded..for language.
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All males normalize to age twelve. Except when there are bewbies involved. Then you normalize to age fourteen.
Carry on.
All males normalize to age twelve. Except when there are bewbies involved. Then you normalize to age fourteen.
Carry on.
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Once again, way, way out. Middle school humor gets me EVERY time. It's what I do. :rolf:
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Out
It made me laugh. An auto correct that took place about 15 minutes ago...
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([url]http://s93.photobucket.com/user/clay_lubbers/media/Screenshot_2016-10-10-21-41-53_zpstrrjge6h.png.html[/url])
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Dear Sir,
Thank you for the unexpected and unsolicited submission of your penis portrait for our consideration. We regret to inform you that it has failed to pass our most basic standards of quality control at this time.
However, for a nominal fee we can offer you a report that will help you change that.
The A4 report, provided via postal service, will include a personalised booklet that cover the following:
Why genitals are not an acceptable conversation opener (a step by step guide to saying hello)
How to appear as though you weren’t raised by wolves
Better ways to deal with your sexual frustration
How to dress your penis for social media (a rough guide to pants)
AND
Penis reading: a new form of palmistry that may help you unlock the key to your future.
We will also answer questions you might have such as:
Do I have too much time on my hands?
AND
Why did my penis fail basic standards of quality control?
(Note: the number one reason for this occurring is that it is attached to a bigger dick than itself.)
Finally, as a gesture of goodwill we intend to offer two free samples with all of your future penis portrait submissions:
An inventive critique of your pride & joy
AND
A surprise consultation with your closest available family member about your portfolio.
We trust this exciting offer is acceptable and look forward to working with you in the near future.
Yours faithfully.”
Out.Dear Sir,
Thank you for the unexpected and unsolicited submission of your penis portrait for our consideration. We regret to inform you that it has failed to pass our most basic standards of quality control at this time.
However, for a nominal fee we can offer you a report that will help you change that.
The A4 report, provided via postal service, will include a personalised booklet that cover the following:
Why genitals are not an acceptable conversation opener (a step by step guide to saying hello)
How to appear as though you weren’t raised by wolves
Better ways to deal with your sexual frustration
How to dress your penis for social media (a rough guide to pants)
AND
Penis reading: a new form of palmistry that may help you unlock the key to your future.
We will also answer questions you might have such as:
Do I have too much time on my hands?
AND
Why did my penis fail basic standards of quality control?
(Note: the number one reason for this occurring is that it is attached to a bigger dick than itself.)
Finally, as a gesture of goodwill we intend to offer two free samples with all of your future penis portrait submissions:
An inventive critique of your pride & joy
AND
A surprise consultation with your closest available family member about your portfolio.
We trust this exciting offer is acceptable and look forward to working with you in the near future.
Yours faithfully.”
Sadly these are being sent by women on sites like 'OkCupid' (dating sites) because losers send them dick-pics.
Carl
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https://thevalleyreport.com/2016/02/13/florida-man-dies-in-meth-lab-explosion-after-lighting-farts-on-fire/
The man’s wife was found lying naked on the couple’s front yard, reportedly still laughing. “A Blue Angel is when you put a lighter up to your butt and fart on it, making it catch on fire. It’s funny as s—,” explains the mans wife, who claims to be an expert on the subject. “Normally we go to Del Taco because of their $0.59 tacos, but we made some extra cash this week so we went to Chipotle. The farts you get from there could fill a gas chamber. I know he’s looking up from hell laughing his ass off saying it was worth it,” she says smiling through blackened teeth, apparently not caused by the fire.
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Don't matter whether it's half full or half empty.
It's glass. It sweats when it's cold, and breaks when it slips out of your hand and falls.
Let's keep the real political ones out of here...
Let's keep the real political ones out of here...
Hello.
So you're saying that my picture about a jet for lease was a political statement and not a joke?
Please advise. I would like to be clear on what ST.org's definition of "political" is.
Thank you.
All actions and thoughts are political.
All actions and thoughts are political.
Well damn! I guess we're just gonna have to close up here and not post anything?!?! :headscratch:
Yep, but it's a slippery slope. I too found it funny, but I also get how some may have found it political. Whatever. Post it back up if you want it, but if it starts to get crazy in here things will have to be nuked. People cry either way, and I have very little tolerance for whining.
Of course if one really wants political funnies, there's a whole thread at the old place for that. I just think we DO NOT want that kind of stuff over here. It spills over into everything and has become a cancer at Sport-politics.net. I don't think we want that at his place.
Heavy-handed moderator bastards. I guess someone needs to be the dick. :bigok:
Go heavy, Clay. There's a reason I totally forgot there even existed a politics forum. I blocked it as soon as I signed up. There might be others as well. Since there is a place for that, there should be no whining. I come here to escape that stuff. Not so much even the subject matter, but the ugly that inevitably follows it around.
You know you live in a small town when this ([url]http://www.myhighplains.com/news/second-amarillo-dunkin-donuts-and-baskin-robbins-multi-brand-restaurant-opens[/url]) makes the news.
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([url]http://s53.photobucket.com/user/GeneralPig/media/trump_zpsrevavplm.jpg.html[/url])
President Trump: The Inauguration
4pm, BBC One/ STV
"After a long absence, The Twilight Zone returns with one of the most ambitious, expensive and controversial productions in broadcast history. Sci-fi writers have dabbled often with alternative history stories - among the most common is the "What If The Nazis Had Won The Second World War" setting - but this huge interactive virtual reality project, which will unfold on TV, in the press, and on Twitter over the next four years, sets out to build an ongoing alternative present.
The story begins in a nightmarish version of 2017 in which huge sections of the US electorate have somehow been duped into voting to make Donald Trump president. It sounds far-fetched, and it is, but as it goes on it becomes more and more chillingly plausible. Today's feature-length opener concentrates on the gaudy inauguration of President Trump, and the stirrings of protest and despair surrounding the ceremony, while pundits speculate gravely on what lies ahead. It's a flawed piece, but a disturbing glimpse of the horrors we could stumble into, if we're not careful."
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best thing ever
https://youtu.be/Jdobowvu12I
best thing ever
https://youtu.be/Jdobowvu12I
Concur.
best thing ever
https://youtu.be/Jdobowvu12I
best thing ever
https://youtu.be/Jdobowvu12I
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Maybe this is only new to me, but I laughed through the whole thing.
Maybe this is only new to me, but I laughed through the whole thing.
[url]http://youtu.be/LdVBkn6ohH8[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/LdVBkn6ohH8[/url])
Maybe this is only new to me, but I laughed through the whole thing.
[url]http://youtu.be/LdVBkn6ohH8[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/LdVBkn6ohH8[/url])
:rolf:
I've never seen that before.
...
In the wake of horrible events, sometimes you do have to laugh.
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How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?
Ask them to pronounce "unionized."
How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?
Ask them to pronounce "unionized."
The plumber wouldn't get the joke.
Son: How come you named my sister "Teresa"?
Dad: Because your mom loves Easter - it'a an anagram.
Son: Thanks, Dad
Dad: No problem, Alan.
I'm slow. Mom loves it. Got it.
- Dan
I'm slow. Mom loves it. Got it.
- Dan
It took me a while, too.
I'm slow. Mom loves it. Got it.
- Dan
It took me a while, too.
I had to invoke some GoogleFu
I'm nearly positive this has been posted before, but I saw it again today and lost:
[url]http://youtu.be/zkv-_LqTeQA[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/zkv-_LqTeQA[/url])
Made me laugh.
I'm nearly positive this has been posted before, but I saw it again today and lost:
[url]http://youtu.be/zkv-_LqTeQA[/url] ([url]http://youtu.be/zkv-_LqTeQA[/url])
Riding across that bridge in the wind was like running on a trampoline.
Riding across that bridge in the wind was like running on a trampoline.
It's the only bridge that doesn't scare me.
They never are but always will be.
Also,
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They never are but always will be.
Agree.
Turtles was
As
Turtles
Does be
Also,
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Wait a minute!! I'M a Marine Biologist..... :-X
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I could not help myself
Caution: Contains Salty Language
Almost certainly NSFW unless you work someplace cool.
! No longer available ([url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j75VSnc9_cY#[/url])
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