The Rant thread, what pisses you off? (no politics or religion allowed) NSFW

[mxvet57]

I see you have been to Wisconsin.

FIB!

And dam proud of it to. 

[Cookie]

Okay, our monitoring team aren't system admins. They're application admins. They sort of know how the monitoring software works. Sort of. The last time a major upgrade was done, all the settings were erased and had to be restored from backup. That's because instead of creating new templates and policy files, they used the samples that came with the application. Of course the upgrade provided new samples erasing the existing ones. This was a few years back.

Now they're upgrading again.

It's already been a nightmare. Instead of creating a new environment on Linux (old is on Solaris) and methodically transitioning the old environment over to the new one, they lifted the old environment and copied it over. Bringing over all the hacks and patches, poorly written scripts, and mashed together configurations.

Then switch the servers over and fix what breaks. 

Initially the new agents were segfaulting constantly. Like 5,000 messages over a weekend and 2,000 over an evening on the second go around. So we raised a fuss and caused them to stop and fix all the segfaulting before moving forward. We had to apply hotfixes to 50 or 60 servers and restart or reinstall agents.

This week they called an 'incident' where all the necessary resources are pulled off of other work just to deal with this upgrade. No matter what the other work is, it all stops until the upgrade (which was supposed to be completed Dec 31st) is done.

The two senior admins (me and another guys) are pretty much dedicated to this while the rest of the team is snagged to do tasks when we're overwhelmed on some task.

One problem is the new environment. In the old environment, all the tasks were on a single Solaris server. The new environment is on Linux and is spread across at least 3 servers if not more.

A little back story. Back when I first started, installing the agent on a multi-homed system (server with a management interface and an application interface) required the running of a script to update the agent configuration to use the management IP for traffic. See we deal with 911. We are the backbone of 911 services in the US and Canada. So we multihome, multisite systems to provide redundancy. Anyway, when the agent gets its SSL cert in order to talk to the main management system, the management system does a DNS lookup on the IP which returns the management hostname. Unfortunately the agent is passing back the application hostname along with the management IP so the monitoring team has to manually add an entry in the /etc/hosts file for each server. At the beginning it was 130 or so servers. Now we're approaching 600 servers and apparently it's affecting performance.

I bring it up this morning because the consultant is saying all the systems need to be DNS resolvable and it can't because of the way the configuration is. Our Senior System Administrator in the Monitoring group (I should say again that he's by no means a Sr SysAdmin) says the agent isn't able to be changed and that we should run monitoring through the application interfaces. "It's only like 10% of the bandwidth."

IT'S FUCKING 911 CALL PATH TRAFFIC! NO!

We chatted with the consultant who said our systems need to conform to RFC 952 standards where it's IP, FQDN, aliases in the /etc/hosts file and things will work. I headed back to my desk and brought up the RFC, and the manual page for the /etc/hosts file. Sorry you condescending consultant, the RFC and hosts man page only say it's the official name. There's nothing that requires it be an FQDN.

Then I checked out the agent. The agent our Senior System Administrator (who I had to show how to search and replace in 'vi') said had to use the application interface, just like at his last job. Sure enough, there's a command to let you associate the management hostname with the ip in the configuration. I identify 200 servers that are misconfigured, turn 25 over to one of the other admins and I work out a procedure to do upgrades. That's stop the agent, delete it from the management console, delete the certificate on the server, correct the hostname, recreate the certificate with the new name, add it back in to the management console, and restart the agent.

That's what we're doing 8 hour shifts doing right now (I'm off at 3pm).

And because it's a multi-system environment now, the Cisco gear's SNMP MIB file is not being translated due to the performance issues. See everything was on one server before so SNMP traps would be resolved through one of the tools on the management server and a plain text message would go out to networking. But because of the performance issue, the tool (which is on a different monitoring server) has been bypassed. So no more Cisco translations. Networking is getting 'Status: 1' messages and not the actual problem. So the networking gear is still using the old system until the problems with the new gear is resolved.

What. A. Cluster. Fuck.

And it's not over yet. And there are other things, this is just today's fun.

Carl

People who write wicked long drawn out posts that are way too long to read in a nonsensical thread in a nonsensical forum and seem to set it up for even further rants in the future by saying its not over yet.

That and run on sentences.

Sent from my Nexus 7 using Tapatalk

[Formerly Known as Bigfoot]

Okay, our monitoring team aren't system admins. They're application admins. They sort of know how the monitoring software works. Sort of. The last time a major upgrade was done, all the settings were erased and had to be restored from backup. That's because instead of creating new templates and policy files, they used the samples that came with the application. Of course the upgrade provided new samples erasing the existing ones. This was a few years back.

Now they're upgrading again.

It's already been a nightmare. Instead of creating a new environment on Linux (old is on Solaris) and methodically transitioning the old environment over to the new one, they lifted the old environment and copied it over. Bringing over all the hacks and patches, poorly written scripts, and mashed together configurations.

Then switch the servers over and fix what breaks. 

Initially the new agents were segfaulting constantly. Like 5,000 messages over a weekend and 2,000 over an evening on the second go around. So we raised a fuss and caused them to stop and fix all the segfaulting before moving forward. We had to apply hotfixes to 50 or 60 servers and restart or reinstall agents.

This week they called an 'incident' where all the necessary resources are pulled off of other work just to deal with this upgrade. No matter what the other work is, it all stops until the upgrade (which was supposed to be completed Dec 31st) is done.

The two senior admins (me and another guys) are pretty much dedicated to this while the rest of the team is snagged to do tasks when we're overwhelmed on some task.

One problem is the new environment. In the old environment, all the tasks were on a single Solaris server. The new environment is on Linux and is spread across at least 3 servers if not more.

A little back story. Back when I first started, installing the agent on a multi-homed system (server with a management interface and an application interface) required the running of a script to update the agent configuration to use the management IP for traffic. See we deal with 911. We are the backbone of 911 services in the US and Canada. So we multihome, multisite systems to provide redundancy. Anyway, when the agent gets its SSL cert in order to talk to the main management system, the management system does a DNS lookup on the IP which returns the management hostname. Unfortunately the agent is passing back the application hostname along with the management IP so the monitoring team has to manually add an entry in the /etc/hosts file for each server. At the beginning it was 130 or so servers. Now we're approaching 600 servers and apparently it's affecting performance.

I bring it up this morning because the consultant is saying all the systems need to be DNS resolvable and it can't because of the way the configuration is. Our Senior System Administrator in the Monitoring group (I should say again that he's by no means a Sr SysAdmin) says the agent isn't able to be changed and that we should run monitoring through the application interfaces. "It's only like 10% of the bandwidth."

IT'S FUCKING 911 CALL PATH TRAFFIC! NO!

We chatted with the consultant who said our systems need to conform to RFC 952 standards where it's IP, FQDN, aliases in the /etc/hosts file and things will work. I headed back to my desk and brought up the RFC, and the manual page for the /etc/hosts file. Sorry you condescending consultant, the RFC and hosts man page only say it's the official name. There's nothing that requires it be an FQDN.

Then I checked out the agent. The agent our Senior System Administrator (who I had to show how to search and replace in 'vi') said had to use the application interface, just like at his last job. Sure enough, there's a command to let you associate the management hostname with the ip in the configuration. I identify 200 servers that are misconfigured, turn 25 over to one of the other admins and I work out a procedure to do upgrades. That's stop the agent, delete it from the management console, delete the certificate on the server, correct the hostname, recreate the certificate with the new name, add it back in to the management console, and restart the agent.

That's what we're doing 8 hour shifts doing right now (I'm off at 3pm).

And because it's a multi-system environment now, the Cisco gear's SNMP MIB file is not being translated due to the performance issues. See everything was on one server before so SNMP traps would be resolved through one of the tools on the management server and a plain text message would go out to networking. But because of the performance issue, the tool (which is on a different monitoring server) has been bypassed. So no more Cisco translations. Networking is getting 'Status: 1' messages and not the actual problem. So the networking gear is still using the old system until the problems with the new gear is resolved.

What. A. Cluster. Fuck.

And it's not over yet. And there are other things, this is just today's fun.

Carl

People who write wicked long drawn out posts that are way too long to read in a nonsensical thread in a nonsensical forum and seem to set it up for even further rants in the future by saying its not over yet.

That and run on sentences.

Sent from my Nexus 7 using Tapatalk

You actually read all that?

Can we get a 200 word limit on this thread??

[capirex]

You actually read all that?

I read it but Im a sysadmin.   
Did you jokers really need to quote it?  Twice?   

Carl what monitoring software are you using?  Ive been using Paessler PRTG for years which seems to be the 'go to' but Im wondering if there is something else out there.

[Max Wedge]

People who think that the 2.89375 second gap I have to the car in front of me was left there intentionally so they could move into my lane, sometimes maybe just half of it, if they are feeling particularly non-committal to their lane.

[I'm NOT Carl]

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[HipGnosis]

I have just enough memory of programming training to read that as; no politics, or... religion allowed

[viffergyrl]

Actually, Carl's post is the embodiment of a true rant; what the rest of us do is just piss and moan.

 

[Cookie]

Actually, Carl's post is the embodiment of a true rant; what the rest of us do is just piss and moan.

 

Yup.

Sent from my Nexus 7 using Tapatalk

[CLAY]

BLAH BLAH BLAH BIG WORDS BLAH BLAH TERMS I DON'T KNOW BLAH BLAH
Carl

I don't know what any of that means, but it was awesome I'm sure.   

[stew71]

That's what we're doing 8 hour shifts doing right now (I'm off at 3pm).

What. A. Cluster. Fuck.

And it's not over yet. And there are other things, this is just today's fun.

Carl

So quit ranting on the Internet and get back to work.   

[Black Hills]

is Carl speaking English?

[Cookie]

BLAH BLAH BLAH BIG WORDS BLAH BLAH TERMS I DON'T KNOW BLAH BLAH
Carl

I don't know what any of that means, but it was awesome I'm sure.   

That was funny.

[I'm NOT Carl]

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[doc4216]

People leaving helpful, feel good messages on your desk.

We've been in emergency mode all week due to a cock-up by the consulting company hired to assist in rolling out a monitoring upgrade. 24/7 support mode with someone available and mostly in the office to help with problems (and there have been many).

I found a helpful little bottle cap from one of the Tea companies on my desk this morning.

"Give the benefit of the doubt every time."

You know, I will give you the benefit of the doubt when we first have to do something together. You are supposed to be the SME (Subject Matter Expert) so I bow to your knowledge. Hell, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt when we're discussing something different even though you've shown you don't know what you're talking about in other technical situations.

However if you continue to show that you are _not_ a capable admin, that you have no concept of production support, that you that you are by no means a SME, especially when I can find the right answer with a few minutes of checking, then I will distrust you.

I'm the responsible person for these systems. If you dick something up, _I_ have to fix it. Every time _I_ have to _fix_ something you dick up, I'm less trusting of your "skills". To the point that my default is, I'm going to want to do it myself vs letting you do it, even though your way might be quicker. At least I'll know it's done right.

So don't leave your fucking trash on my desk.

These things are inappropriate in a work setting. Leave that shit for your social life.

Carl

Now that's a rant. You might be the SME on rants, Sir!

[I'm NOT Carl]

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[doc4216]

Now that's a rant. You might be the SME on rants, Sir!

I'm learning. Sometimes you're going to get somewhat technical rants. There used to be a special little ranty place on usenet for us admins. We could be a little ranty on Slashdot but that seems to be turning into a corporate shill place.

Maybe I should start up my own ranty site similar to the original Usenet group I used to be on.

Hmmm...

Carl

Dont go anywhere! I like it.  I would rant more but Im usually so fired up that my typing cant keep up with my mouth. Plus it would only be about military issues or people's driving.

[CLAY]

People leaving helpful, feel good messages on your desk.

We've been in emergency mode all week due to a cock-up by the consulting company hired to assist in rolling out a monitoring upgrade. 24/7 support mode with someone available and mostly in the office to help with problems (and there have been many).

I found a helpful little bottle cap from one of the Tea companies on my desk this morning.

"Give the benefit of the doubt every time."

You know, I will give you the benefit of the doubt when we first have to do something together. You are supposed to be the SME (Subject Matter Expert) so I bow to your knowledge. Hell, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt when we're discussing something different even though you've shown you don't know what you're talking about in other technical situations.

However if you continue to show that you are _not_ a capable admin, that you have no concept of production support, that you that you are by no means a SME, especially when I can find the right answer with a few minutes of checking, then I will distrust you.

I'm the responsible person for these systems. If you dick something up, _I_ have to fix it. Every time _I_ have to _fix_ something you dick up, I'm less trusting of your "skills". To the point that my default is, I'm going to want to do it myself vs letting you do it, even though your way might be quicker. At least I'll know it's done right.

So don't leave your fucking trash on my desk.

These things are inappropriate in a work setting. Leave that shit for your social life.

Carl

Now that's a rant. You might be the SME on rants, Sir!

+1.  Well done- even *I* understood that one!   

[HipGnosis]

I'm SOOO tired of SUVs drifting into my lane just because there is some packed snow in their lane!!!

[cultureslayer]

Are the SUVs lowered with bling bling wheels?  I hate it when people do that shit to what is supposed to be an OFF ROAD vehicle.  What are they thinking?  "Hmm, I think I want to buy a vehicle that handles like crap, and remove the one possible use that it might have other than hauling my sorry ass to the probation office?"

The plain SUVs are driven by soccer moms so that's not much better.

The main advantage of driving a station wagon is that I get lumped in with these bozos so people give me plenty of room when I'm driving it and the cops don't seem to care what I do behind the wheel.  That or they think I'm driving a green hearse and late to a funeral.   

[FJR1300]

Dont go anywhere! I like it.  I would rant more but Im usually so fired up that my typing cant keep up with my mouth. Plus it would only be about military issues or people's driving.

She's right... don't go anywhere. After reading your rants you make me feel better about my job.

Oh doc... feel free to rant about drivers. Especially because you live in Floriduh. 

[CLAY]

Busy-ness.  I hate it.  I need amounts of down time, and I am not getting what I need this week or next.  Suck.  It's some good stuff, but its busy. 

[kneescrubber]

Narcissism. It is rampant in this country. Humility is so hard to find.





Not here though. I think the level of humility here is admirable.

[Scottzilla]

People, especially non-riders, who think it's okay to put their screaming snot-nosed brat on your bike to pose for some stupid Facebook picture while you're inside eating lunch.

"Hey, do you mind if I just hop up onto the hood of your fucking Nissan for a quick nap?"

That's the nice thing about owning a KLR.  Nobody wants to take a picture.

[Scottzilla]

Go to Google, type in "Prius Avalanche Gay", hit "I'm feeling lucky" and see what pops up.  Just sayin...

Go to google and type in " Midwest Amish beard porn" and hit "I'm feeling lucky". 
Just sayin...

I dare you to google roof smut.

+1 for really obscure reference. 

[Scottzilla]

Busy-ness.  I hate it.  I need amounts of down time, and I am not getting what I need this week or next.  Suck.  It's some good stuff, but its busy. 

You have summers off. Harden up dick head. 

[Cookie]

Hi Scott.

Sent from Planet Ten by way of the Eighth Dimension.

[CLAY]

Busy-ness.  I hate it.  I need amounts of down time, and I am not getting what I need this week or next.  Suck.  It's some good stuff, but its busy. 

You have summers off. Harden up dick head.

Still overcompensating I see.   

[mxvet57]

Narcissism. It is rampant in this country. Humility is so hard to find.

Not here though. I think the level of humility here is admirable.

I don't want to hear you piss, bitching, and mooning come July.

[kneescrubber]

Narcissism. It is rampant in this country. Humility is so hard to find.

Not here though. I think the level of humility here is admirable.

I don't want to hear you piss, bitching, and mooning come July.

You know it's coming. 

[Formerly Known as Bigfoot]

Narcissism. It is rampant in this country. Humility is so hard to find.

Not here though. I think the level of humility here is admirable.

I don't want to hear you piss, bitching, and mooning come July.

Yes please, no "mooning" in July.  It's not decent. 

[Formerly Known as Bigfoot]

Truck drivers.  Normally have few issues with them but the past couple days I've seen some real dickheads.  Drove first to NC then to Fla due to a death in the family.  I saw more truck drivers cutting people off to pass other trucks only to take miles to barely drive 1 MPH faster than the truck they were passing while blocking the left lane.  Had two dickheads yesterday refuse to move over while I was merging from a ramp and they had no one in the left lane blocking them. 

[Stripes]

Truck drivers think that they own the roads. They seem to forget that they share them.

[doc4216]

I hate when I get up on the weekend thinking I am going to have some peace and quiet, drink coffee, check you guys out and my 75 lb dog (normally backup not the barker) goes ape shit about something. So to keep the spouse sleeping, I get up in a hurry to see what it is and get the dog to stop barking and its NOTHING! or its a dog that walks by every morning, just we have to bark at it this morning for some insane reason!!   

Only when I have a morning to relax

[satxbonneville]

Narcissism. It is rampant in this country. Humility is so hard to find.





Not here though. I think the level of humility here is admirable.

The pride we take in our collective humility really shines through.

[Flyer]

Narcissism.

You're beautiful.

[Scottzilla]

The polar vortex is coming back our way after hitting 50 this past weekend.  The roads had too much salt and snow melt for my liking so I couldn't do any riding.
March is a horrible, horrible month.  Probably the worst month of the year becasue they tell you spring is coming but it has 31 long, cold days to conquer.  March should be named "February II" because it sucks so bad.  While we're on it, let's change the calender as follows:
January 15 days.
February 14 days.
February II 15 days.
April 20 days.
May 22 days
June 50 days
July 60 days
August 61 days
September 61 days
October 14 days
November 2 days.  Fuck November
December 12 days.  The 12 days of Christmas.  Let everyone burn themselves out in 12 days.  Sure, some will die but it's worth it.

Now, if you do the math we're missing 19 days.  Good, we don't need that many days in a year and we will technically live longer with less days in a year.   

So there you go, problem solved.

That's not my rant. 
My rant actually pertains to people who wash their cars.  I'm not referring to people who wait on line at the car wash (That's it's own special sickness) i'm talking about those who drag the hose out and pull the car up in the driveway and get the soapy pail and sponge out.
If you have time to wash a car, you have no life.
Let me say this again: IF YOU HAVE TIME TO WASH A CAR, YOU HAVE NO LIFE.
You are literally out of more important stuff to do.  I attempted to compile a list of stuff that is much more important than washing your fucking car and stopped at 1068.  I mean, if you wake up on a Saturday morning and proclaim, "HONEY!  IM GOING TO WASH THE CAR" you have nothing left.  your checkbook is balanced, the pimples on your back are popped, you don't have to piss or shit, your retirement plan is in order, the house is clean, the laundry done, the sink and dishwasher is empty, the grass cut, the leaves picked up the wife fucked, the teeth brushed, the dog groomed, the litter box cleaned, the fridge cleaned, the carpet vacuumed, the zombie apocolypse exit strategy is planned, the fire alarms have fresh batteries, the homework is done, the computer is backed up and thousands & thousands of more important tasks are DONE, FINISHED. 
You have nothing to do. 
Then go wash your car.

Then kill yourself.   

[Max Wedge]

The polar vortex is coming back our way after hitting 50 this past weekend.  The roads had too much salt and snow melt for my liking so I couldn't do any riding.
March is a horrible, horrible month.  Probably the worst month of the year becasue they tell you spring is coming but it has 31 long, cold days to conquer.  March should be named "February II" because it sucks so bad.  While we're on it, let's change the calender as follows:
January 15 days.
February 14 days.
February II 15 days.
April 20 days.
May 22 days
June 50 days
July 60 days
August 61 days
September 61 days
October 14 days
November 2 days.  Fuck November
December 12 days.  The 12 days of Christmas.  Let everyone burn themselves out in 12 days.  Sure, some will die but it's worth it.

Now, if you do the math we're missing 19 days.  Good, we don't need that many days in a year and we will technically live longer with less days in a year.   

So there you go, problem solved.

That's not my rant. 
My rant actually pertains to people who wash their cars.  I'm not referring to people who wait on line at the car wash (That's it's own special sickness) i'm talking about those who drag the hose out and pull the car up in the driveway and get the soapy pail and sponge out.
If you have time to wash a car, you have no life.
Let me say this again: IF YOU HAVE TIME TO WASH A CAR, YOU HAVE NO LIFE.
You are literally out of more important stuff to do.I attempted to compile a list of stuff that is much more important than washing your fucking car and stopped at 1068.  I mean, if you wake up on a Saturday morning and proclaim, "HONEY!  IM GOING TO WASH THE CAR" you have nothing left.  your checkbook is balanced, the pimples on your back are popped, you don't have to piss or shit, your retirement plan is in order, the house is clean, the laundry done, the sink and dishwasher is empty, the grass cut, the leaves picked up the wife fucked, the teeth brushed, the dog groomed, the litter box cleaned, the fridge cleaned, the carpet vacuumed, the zombie apocalypse exit strategy is planned, the fire alarms have fresh batteries, the homework is done, the computer is backed up and thousands & thousands of more important tasks are DONE, FINISHED. 
You have nothing to do. 
Then go wash your car.

Then kill yourself.   

Just throwing this out there.....maybe all your neighbors have their shit together AND have finished all of the above? They have nothing more important to do. They don't kill themselves because now it is important to put away the hose, wring out the sponge, etc. They are creating chores for themselves by washing the car.

I agree with your calendar, but I think you were optimistic giving April as many days as you did. Maybe shave another 5?

[mxvet57]

Obviously if Scott has time to write a rant that long he has nothing better to do in his life.

Maybe you should get out the hose and wash your bike.

[capirex]

Obviously if Scott has time to write a rant that long he has nothing better to do in his life.

Maybe you should get out the hose and wash your bike Prius.

Weak rant Scott.  D+

[Scottzilla]

you're gay.

[Papa Lazarou]

People calling other people gay as a term of abuse

Chinese products. I fecking hate Chinese produts.

[bomber]

I was about to rant about Scottrants . . . . but they are not rant worthy . . . lil squeeky whining from down in the battery compartment . . . .

So I'll rant about Ed.

And cops.

Happy birthday to em both.

F*cking birthdays.

[Black Hills]

why everybody always picking on Ed??

that's as good as I can rant

[squeezer]

why everybody always picking on Ed??

Because he never invites us to his birthday parties.

[mxvet57]

why everybody always picking on Ed??

Because he never invites us to his birthday parties.

Theres always next year.

[mxvet57]

I was about to rant about Scottrants . . . . but they are not rant worthy . . . lil squeeky whining from down in the battery compartment . . . .

So I'll rant about Ed.

And cops.

Happy birthday to em both.

F*cking birthdays.

No pizza for you.

[kneescrubber]

why everybody always picking on Ed??

Because he never invites us to his birthday parties.

There's always next year tomorrow.

[M.Brane]

 People in high places who have no idea what you actually do trying to dictate what you should do, when you should do it, how you should do it, what things you should do it with, and expecting it all to be perfectly documented so it fits into their neat little clueless box.

 Sorry morons life doesn't always work like you think it should. Especially when weather is involved. If we actually tried to do it your way nothing that matters would ever get done.

[mxvet57]

People in high places who have no idea what you actually do trying to dictate what you should do, when you should do it, how you should do it, what things you should do it with, and expecting it all to be perfectly documented so it fits into their neat little clueless box.

 Sorry morons life doesn't always work like you think it should. Especially when weather is involved. If we actually tried to do it your way nothing that matters would ever get done.

Sounds like the owners of the last company i worked for. They believed you could fit a square peg into a round hole.