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Author Topic: Badgers  (Read 3647 times)

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Online Papa Lazarou

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Badgers
« on: January 11, 2014, 08:16:55 AM »
Our gubbernment has had a little experiment in an attempt to control the spread of bovine TB by killing badgers in an area, to see if that reduces infection rates in cows. Badgers may spread the disease, and if a cow gets it, it gets killed. Lots of opposition to this carefully thought out plan (TM).

Sadly, the cost of killing 1771 badgers (not nearly enough to make any difference) works out at over £4K per badger. That's about $6K. I could have my family killed by the Russian mafia for less.

Are badgers particularly difficult to kill? Answers on a postcard to the usual address.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-25622644
Putting the laughter back into manslaughter

Offline satxbonneville

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Re: Badgers
« Reply #1 on: January 11, 2014, 08:29:34 AM »
All you need do is to convince the US that badger is actually code for al-Queda and your problem will be taken care of by precision targeted drone strikes at zero cost to your country. Well, there is that collateral damage aspect but you can't make an omelet without killing a few thousand civilians. And it's your fault if you hang around in areas known to harbor badgers and you kinda look like a badger. F'ckin' badgers.

Offline kneescrubber

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Re: Badgers
« Reply #2 on: January 11, 2014, 08:32:26 AM »
The obvious solution is to hire the Russian Mafia.
Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.

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Offline satxbonneville

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Re: Badgers
« Reply #3 on: January 11, 2014, 08:38:45 AM »
I thought the Russian Mafia would kill his family? Admittedly, that will save his family the agony of worrying about badgers but it does seem a bit harsh. Then again, I'm not a Welshman.

Offline kneescrubber

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Re: Badgers
« Reply #4 on: January 11, 2014, 08:42:51 AM »
Canadian Mafia then.
Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Offline satxbonneville

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Re: Badgers
« Reply #5 on: January 11, 2014, 08:56:07 AM »
The slow death by poutine method, eh?

Offline sleazy rider

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Re: Badgers
« Reply #6 on: January 11, 2014, 08:59:15 AM »
Can cat recipes be adapted for badger?  Win-win!
--Tom

Offline Scratch

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Re: Badgers
« Reply #7 on: January 11, 2014, 10:33:04 AM »
Mushroom Mushroom

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Re: Badgers
« Reply #8 on: January 11, 2014, 10:36:45 AM »
Canadian Mafia then.
Kill them with hockey sticks, Eh?
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Offline Mac

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Re: Badgers
« Reply #9 on: January 11, 2014, 11:30:04 AM »
Badgers?


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We don't need no steenking badgers!
May I mambo dogface to the banana patch?

Offline Max Wedge

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Re: Badgers
« Reply #10 on: January 11, 2014, 12:56:21 PM »
You never see a motorcycle parked outside a psychiatrists' office.
Where am I?

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Re: Badgers
« Reply #11 on: January 11, 2014, 02:15:54 PM »
About time someone posted it.  :facepalm:
"We have constructed pyramids, in honour of our escaping." - Jim Morrison

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Offline stromgal

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Re: Badgers
« Reply #12 on: January 11, 2014, 09:54:32 PM »
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The Lone Rangerette

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Re: Badgers
« Reply #13 on: January 12, 2014, 12:33:13 AM »
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Fuck 'em, Bucky!
If it weren't for the therapeutic properties of the occasional off-camber decreasing radius downhill right-hander I'd almost certainly go completely sane.

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