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Author Topic: Best martial art form for diaper changing?  (Read 1496 times)

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Offline DredheadV2.0

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Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« on: February 09, 2017, 09:24:31 AM »
Which of these martial arts - aikido or hapkido - is more useful during diaper changes?

At first I would have said aikido, as the emphasis on not harming one's opponent whilst redirecting their energies seems ideal, given the opponents are often family members.  But of late, as the opponent has gained a certain amount of canny craft and a surprising amount of core strength, I've taken a shine to hapkido and its inclusion of joint locks.  Despite being an obstreperous pain in the ass sometimes, she's a cute little jerk most of the time and I'd rather keep the trauma to a minimum at this point; there's plenty of time to inflict psychological damage through Dad Humor at a later date.

TIA
D*

Online Black Hills

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #1 on: February 09, 2017, 09:29:32 AM »
oh how I moss those days... all too she will be grown up.

p.s. nice to hear from you again..

Offline Mr. Whippy

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #2 on: February 09, 2017, 09:34:25 AM »
Time.

Time is on your side.
Yes, it is.

Offline DredheadV2.0

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #3 on: February 09, 2017, 09:37:36 AM »
oh how I moss those days... all too she will be grown up.

p.s. nice to hear from you again..

There's always grandkids :D 

no hurry, though.  The SuperMunchkin is 18 now, and frankly gorgeous.  Thankfully she's also sharp as a shuriken and disinclined to keep her mouth shut so she's intimidated most of the boys in her high school.  Hopefully this trend continues for a few more years at least; I'd like to have some time off from small, angry mammals with bladder control issues.




Miss you guys too.  :inlove:

Offline DredheadV2.0

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #4 on: February 09, 2017, 09:38:46 AM »
Time.

Time is on your side.
Yes, it is.

Time?  Keeps on slippin into the future, actually. 

Offline Max Wedge

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #5 on: February 09, 2017, 09:49:49 AM »
Velcro. Good to hear from you.
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Where am I?

Offline jadziadax8

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #6 on: February 09, 2017, 10:18:01 AM »
Judo?  All about the leverage.
She's got a worm in 'er belly? That's disgusting! That's interesting, but very disgusting. 

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Offline Mr. Whippy

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #7 on: February 09, 2017, 10:20:30 AM »
Time.

Time is on your side.
Yes, it is.

Time?  Keeps on slippin into the future, actually.

Slip sliding away.
You know,
the nearer your destination, the more you slip sliding away.

Online Cookie

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #8 on: February 09, 2017, 10:46:04 AM »
Diaper in a can.
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Offline DredheadV2.0

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #9 on: February 09, 2017, 10:58:38 AM »

Online Cookie

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #10 on: February 09, 2017, 11:11:06 AM »
I was thinking this
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Easy clean up and all.
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Online Scratch

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #11 on: February 09, 2017, 01:44:23 PM »
Velcro. Good to hear from you.

Duct tape.  And same.

Offline 1KPerDay

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #12 on: February 09, 2017, 02:15:43 PM »
Sit on the ground indian style with the tyke momentarily still in front of you. Move the comfortable one of your legs over tyke's chest (don't crush tyke, but hold tyke firmly to the floor with calf of your leg). have diaper/wipes/HAZMAT suit ready and within easy reach.

--veteran of twins who were frickin' terrors as babies and are turning 18 next week
My hovercraft is full of eels

Offline Blunder

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #13 on: February 09, 2017, 02:38:01 PM »
Hold mother of child in Ikkyo until she agrees to change baby's diaper.
Torque is cheap.

Online Cablebandit

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #14 on: February 09, 2017, 02:39:51 PM »
Whichever one let's you drop kick the kid to someone else to change it.

Online Cookie

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #15 on: February 09, 2017, 02:53:01 PM »
Don't do what he suggested.
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Offline DredheadV2.0

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #16 on: February 09, 2017, 11:56:45 PM »
Sit on the ground indian style with the tyke momentarily still in front of you. Move the comfortable one of your legs over tyke's chest (don't crush tyke, but hold tyke firmly to the floor with calf of your leg). have diaper/wipes/HAZMAT suit ready and within easy reach.

--veteran of twins who were frickin' terrors as babies and are turning 18 next week

Where's the goddamn "LIKE" button?

Offline DredheadV2.0

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #17 on: February 09, 2017, 11:59:49 PM »
Judo?  All about the leverage.

That was my first thought, but given so much of judo involves throws, I chose to look further.  I'm thinking anything close-combat that as some good pinning/immobilizing moves, but keeps my face out of reach because she's prone to go for an eye-gouge now and again.

Online Vulcanbill

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #18 on: February 10, 2017, 10:14:09 AM »
BJJ.  just cuz

Good to see your name around again. 
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Offline CosmicCowboy

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #19 on: February 10, 2017, 03:04:31 PM »
Aikido is not devoid of injury to your opponent. I've often seen people complain that Aikido demonstrations look too fake, but that's because the uke often goes with the throw or technique in order to avoid injury. Otherwise...yeah. Plenty of ways to injure someone in Aikido.

I suggest Krav Maga. Why? Because they count rank in patches. Know who else counts rank in patches? Girl Scouts. Food (or cookies, at least) for thought.

Offline Scottzilla

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #20 on: March 01, 2017, 08:56:24 AM »
Have kid countertop height if possible.
 Lay the little shit on it's back so it's head is to your left. Lightly grasp the left leg above the ankle Between your pinky & ring finger of your left hand.  Grab little shit's right leg between the index & middle finger also with your left hand.
you can now rasie the legs up exposing the job site and use your right hand as needed.  You can put the legs down as you prep so you will not be shat or pissed upon.
Works awesome and gives you complete control over the little shits movement.
You're welcome.

Offline Bounce

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Re: Best martial art form for diaper changing?
« Reply #21 on: March 01, 2017, 08:18:48 PM »
Memory allows you to chrome plate the past and make it more shiny that it was.

We now have grandkids and there are good times but the tantrums make me wonder if liberals is a genetics thing. My schedule is FUBARd and the way to make the day productive is to come home after my 5am call and catch a power nap early. To have a grand kid sneak in and yell WAKE UP GAMPA when you are just getting set into REM sleep puts the kybosh on that in a hurry.