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Author Topic: The Post-Ho Thread  (Read 265170 times)

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Online Baxter

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1800 on: September 16, 2019, 08:48:42 PM »
Tomato paste is made of tomatoes, chicken paste out of chicken, toothpaste-I'll leave it to you to join the dots...

Thanks for that one.  I'm gonna steal it and use it on some young'uns this weekend.
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Offline Eh2zed

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1801 on: September 16, 2019, 09:13:30 PM »
What is used to make toilet paper?
My GPS just told me to turn left, then turn left, then turn left, then turn left.
So if I go too far left do I end up right?

Offline Cookie

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1802 on: September 17, 2019, 05:43:44 AM »
And it's been doing just fine thank you very much. Don't break it.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1803 on: September 17, 2019, 09:24:32 AM »
I had one of those too but the wheels fell off.
My GPS just told me to turn left, then turn left, then turn left, then turn left.
So if I go too far left do I end up right?

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1804 on: September 18, 2019, 05:16:18 AM »
You shoulda used a touque wench.
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Offline Eh2zed

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1805 on: September 18, 2019, 06:30:31 AM »
Moi and syrop d’erable avec my tuque...and the bolts never fall off.
My GPS just told me to turn left, then turn left, then turn left, then turn left.
So if I go too far left do I end up right?

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1806 on: September 18, 2019, 05:19:22 PM »
Now you’re cookin’
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Offline Cookie

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1807 on: September 18, 2019, 05:23:17 PM »
Tights right, too tights broken.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1808 on: September 18, 2019, 05:26:22 PM »
I’m scared of yoga pants.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1809 on: September 18, 2019, 05:30:09 PM »
Feta feta feta!!!!
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1810 on: September 18, 2019, 08:46:31 PM »
OPAH!
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1811 on: September 20, 2019, 09:02:30 PM »
How gluten sensitive a person is is directly proportional to how much they spent at Lululemon last year.
If it weren't for the therapeutic properties of the occasional off-camber decreasing radius downhill right-hander I'd almost certainly go completely sane.

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1812 on: September 23, 2019, 05:06:35 AM »
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potoooooooo

Abingdon intended to call the young colt "Potato" and instructed the stable boy to write the name on a feed bin. The stable boy spelled the name as "Potoooooooo" (Pot followed by 8 "o"s), which so amused Abingdon that he adopted the spelling
Putting the laughter back into manslaughter

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1813 on: September 23, 2019, 05:25:47 AM »
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potoooooooo

Abingdon intended to call the young colt "Potato" and instructed the stable boy to write the name on a feed bin. The stable boy spelled the name as "Potoooooooo" (Pot followed by 8 "o"s), which so amused Abingdon that he adopted the spelling


I am not wearing pants.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1814 on: September 23, 2019, 06:14:42 AM »
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potoooooooo

Abingdon intended to call the young colt "Potato" and instructed the stable boy to write the name on a feed bin. The stable boy spelled the name as "Potoooooooo" (Pot followed by 8 "o"s), which so amused Abingdon that he adopted the spelling


I am not wearing pants.

poor shed
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Offline Cookie

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1815 on: September 23, 2019, 06:30:28 AM »
Alas poor Yorick, I knew him Pamela.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1816 on: September 23, 2019, 03:11:23 PM »
Aunt Arthur had one in his basement.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1817 on: September 23, 2019, 03:38:22 PM »
Bea Arthur had droopy boobs.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1818 on: September 23, 2019, 07:15:07 PM »
Arthur Godfrey had man boobs.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1819 on: October 15, 2019, 03:23:50 PM »
Quantum mechanics, the dreams stuff is made of.
If it weren't for the therapeutic properties of the occasional off-camber decreasing radius downhill right-hander I'd almost certainly go completely sane.

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Online Baxter

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1820 on: October 15, 2019, 08:33:33 PM »
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potoooooooo

Abingdon intended to call the young colt "Potato" and instructed the stable boy to write the name on a feed bin. The stable boy spelled the name as "Potoooooooo" (Pot followed by 8 "o"s), which so amused Abingdon that he adopted the spelling

I never can pass this posting without thinking of Samwise's discussion about potatoes with Gollum in the LOTR movies.  That's the voice I hear the instructions being given to the stable boy.
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.  --Douglas Adams

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1821 on: October 19, 2019, 12:28:10 AM »
Another wooden ball. Would it kill the makers of avocados to include a different toy, like a mood ring or a novelty eraser?
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1822 on: October 23, 2019, 03:10:56 PM »
Never trust a man in a wheelchair with dirty shoes
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Online Baxter

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1823 on: October 23, 2019, 04:17:38 PM »
My wife complains that I snore.  I'm not snoring, I'm just dreaming that I'm a motorcycle.
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.  --Douglas Adams

Online Baxter

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1824 on: October 23, 2019, 05:03:58 PM »
More of a random thought:

Earth must have been discovered by space aliens, and they are secretly here and manipulating us.  Otherwise, why would every motorcycle come with a Romulan Cloaking Device that can't be turned off?
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.  --Douglas Adams

Offline Eh2zed

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1825 on: October 24, 2019, 11:13:04 AM »
How many grains of sand are there on the planet?
My GPS just told me to turn left, then turn left, then turn left, then turn left.
So if I go too far left do I end up right?

Offline stevent

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1826 on: October 24, 2019, 11:54:01 AM »
How many grains of sand are there on the planet?

35,036. they actually float just above the ground so that the planet spins beneath them like a record player. All the sand you see is just the same grains in an apparently different place, except the ones that fell off the edge of the earth and float around in space. Those reflect moonlight at night like the sequins on Wayne Newtons Tux. That's why they're called "stars"
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Offline Eh2zed

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1827 on: October 24, 2019, 03:53:50 PM »
You’re a songwriter?
Cool. Can I have a copy of your next VHS tape?
My GPS just told me to turn left, then turn left, then turn left, then turn left.
So if I go too far left do I end up right?

Offline Cookie

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1828 on: October 24, 2019, 03:55:38 PM »
Bingo was his name-OH!!!
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1829 on: October 25, 2019, 05:52:42 AM »
Chocolate.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1830 on: October 30, 2019, 10:24:49 AM »
If you go to a low carb / no processed sugars diet, after a while milk chocolate tastes disgusting.

Dark chocolate tastes like what chocolate is supposed to taste like. The processed sugars and carbs in milk chocolate, and everything else for that matter, mask your taste buds.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1831 on: October 30, 2019, 03:53:27 PM »
I'm still trying to figure out 42.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1832 on: October 30, 2019, 04:48:25 PM »
It's a bust.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1833 on: October 30, 2019, 05:45:09 PM »
For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.  --Douglas Adams

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1834 on: October 30, 2019, 07:39:23 PM »
We’re really good at this.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1835 on: October 30, 2019, 07:49:53 PM »
Twenty seven acorns in a cup.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1836 on: October 30, 2019, 08:34:24 PM »
A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1837 on: October 31, 2019, 02:25:56 PM »
You’re wrong.
My GPS just told me to turn left, then turn left, then turn left, then turn left.
So if I go too far left do I end up right?

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1838 on: October 31, 2019, 02:39:21 PM »
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1839 on: October 31, 2019, 03:23:40 PM »
For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much—the wheel, New York, wars and so on—whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man—for precisely the same reasons.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1840 on: October 31, 2019, 06:09:26 PM »
Dolfins invented the wheel?
And New York City?
Cool.
Let’s ask them to figure out pi.
My GPS just told me to turn left, then turn left, then turn left, then turn left.
So if I go too far left do I end up right?

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1841 on: October 31, 2019, 06:32:40 PM »
Native American dolphins at that.
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1842 on: November 01, 2019, 05:48:53 AM »
Someone said pie?
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1843 on: November 01, 2019, 09:37:22 AM »
Never mind pie, what about boiled eggs?

The perfect boiled egg requires an instatap set to 190*f to fill the pan, just covering the eggs. Bring to a boil for 4 minutes, you need to be observant because it has to be 4 minutes from start of boil, IE: bubbles BEGIN to rise, through a good rolling boil. At the 4 minute mark, remove from heat, drain and place under a running tap as cold as you can get it. Let the water run over the eggs until your significant other get's up and turns the water off because it annoys her/him and let sit. Conversely you can dump a few cups of ice over the eggs if your ice maker has a few cubes available and let that sit. The point is to remove as much heat as quickly as possible.

Following this procedure should give you an egg with a firm white and runny to starting to coagulate yolk. Use an egg cup, demitasse spoon and peck around the outside about a third of the way down, remove the cap, add  a goodly amount of salt and pepper and enjoy your perfect boiled egg.

If perhaps you want to dip toast fingers into the yolk like a civilized person then go just under 4 minutes for a firm white/ runny yolk combo. 

 :smiley_thumb:
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1844 on: November 01, 2019, 02:15:17 PM »
Put an egg in the freezer the night before. Cut it into four. Fry.
























(It's not really worth the effort)
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Online Baxter

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1845 on: November 01, 2019, 03:38:23 PM »
The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.  --Douglas Adams

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1846 on: November 01, 2019, 05:47:45 PM »
The perfect boiled egg requires an instatap set to 190*f to fill the pan, just covering the eggs. Bring to a boil for 4 minutes, you need to be observant because it has to be 4 minutes from start of boil, IE: bubbles BEGIN to rise, through a good rolling boil. At the 4 minute mark, remove from heat, drain and place under a running tap as cold as you can get it. Let the water run over the eggs until your significant other get's up and turns the water off because it annoys her/him and let sit. Conversely you can dump a few cups of ice over the eggs if your ice maker has a few cubes available and let that sit. The point is to remove as much heat as quickly as possible.

Following this procedure should give you an egg with a firm white and runny to starting to coagulate yolk. Use an egg cup, demitasse spoon and peck around the outside about a third of the way down, remove the cap, add  a goodly amount of salt and pepper and enjoy your perfect boiled egg.

If perhaps you want to dip toast fingers into the yolk like a civilized person then go just under 4 minutes for a firm white/ runny yolk combo. 

 :smiley_thumb:

How much ketchup per egg?
My GPS just told me to turn left, then turn left, then turn left, then turn left.
So if I go too far left do I end up right?

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1847 on: November 01, 2019, 09:30:32 PM »
Well, I’ve never been to Spain,
But I kinda like the music.
Say the ladies are insane there
And they sure know how to use it…
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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1848 on: November 01, 2019, 10:08:30 PM »
Well, I’ve never been to Spain,
But I kinda like the music.
Say the ladies are insane there
And they sure know how to use it…
Down in France
The girls are all salty, the boys are all sweet
The food ain't too shabby
And they piss in the street.
If it weren't for the therapeutic properties of the occasional off-camber decreasing radius downhill right-hander I'd almost certainly go completely sane.

"I like the beverages."  -CLAY

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Re: The Post-Ho Thread
« Reply #1849 on: November 02, 2019, 07:51:27 AM »
I am The Queen of England.
I l...
nevermind
"We have constructed pyramids, in honour of our escaping." - Jim Morrison
"If Slipknot can wear a mask for a full set then you can wear a mask for your trip into Walmart!”
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