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Author Topic: You laugh. You Lose.  (Read 410037 times)

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Online bedlamite

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #450 on: October 07, 2014, 03:28:03 PM »
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A plan is just a list of things that doesn't happen.

Offline rgbeard

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #451 on: October 08, 2014, 08:36:01 PM »
Here ya go:

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Online coho

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #452 on: October 11, 2014, 03:34:07 PM »
If it weren't for the therapeutic properties of the occasional off-camber decreasing radius downhill right-hander I'd almost certainly go completely sane.

"I like the beverages."  -CLAY

Online bedlamite

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #453 on: October 11, 2014, 08:54:40 PM »
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A plan is just a list of things that doesn't happen.

Online coho

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #454 on: October 12, 2014, 02:32:06 AM »
Way, way out. :rolf:
If it weren't for the therapeutic properties of the occasional off-camber decreasing radius downhill right-hander I'd almost certainly go completely sane.

"I like the beverages."  -CLAY

Offline stevent

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #455 on: October 13, 2014, 02:13:32 PM »
 :rolf: :rolf:

Oh My.......
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Offline Dan K

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #456 on: October 15, 2014, 10:37:20 AM »
Hilarious. Copied and forwarded.
Sometimes, the only answer is defenestration.

Offline I'm NOT Carl

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #457 on: October 15, 2014, 10:52:13 AM »
Yea, that was pretty funny when I first read it back when I was on Usenet. :)

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Online Papa Lazarou

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #458 on: October 15, 2014, 11:00:24 AM »
Putting the laughter back into manslaughter

Online coho

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #459 on: October 19, 2014, 12:14:38 PM »
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If it weren't for the therapeutic properties of the occasional off-camber decreasing radius downhill right-hander I'd almost certainly go completely sane.

"I like the beverages."  -CLAY

Online bedlamite

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A plan is just a list of things that doesn't happen.

Online coho

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #461 on: October 21, 2014, 05:19:40 PM »
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If it weren't for the therapeutic properties of the occasional off-camber decreasing radius downhill right-hander I'd almost certainly go completely sane.

"I like the beverages."  -CLAY

Offline bungie4

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #462 on: October 22, 2014, 07:20:06 AM »
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Ya, but the Trojan horse was made of wood. Ever since then, through the centuries, whenever guys get wood, they think of trojans.
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Offline Veefer800canuck

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #463 on: October 22, 2014, 10:31:57 AM »
Rob McKinnon

My visited states map:
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Offline stew71

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #464 on: October 23, 2014, 11:55:34 AM »
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With enough thrust, a pig flies just fine.

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #465 on: October 23, 2014, 01:32:09 PM »
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If it weren't for the therapeutic properties of the occasional off-camber decreasing radius downhill right-hander I'd almost certainly go completely sane.

"I like the beverages."  -CLAY

Offline I'm NOT Carl

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #466 on: October 23, 2014, 04:38:44 PM »
The complete military history of France:

Gallic Wars - Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian.

Hundred Years War - Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman." Sainted.

Italian Wars - Lost. France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians.

Wars of Religion - France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots

Thirty Years War - France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her.

War of Revolution - Tied. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux.

The Dutch War - Tied

War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War - Lost, but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power.

War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since.

American Revolution - In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting."

French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.

The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer.

The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.

World War I - Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.

World War II - Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.

War in Indochina - Lost. French forces plead sickness; take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu

Algerian Rebellion - Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux.

War on Terrorism - France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's.

The question for any country silly enough to count on the French should not be "Can we count on the French?", but rather "How long until France collapses?"

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. All you do is leave behind a lot of noisy baggage."
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Offline Cablebandit

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #467 on: October 24, 2014, 06:49:11 AM »
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Offline Cablebandit

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #468 on: October 24, 2014, 07:06:28 AM »
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Offline I'm NOT Carl

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #469 on: October 24, 2014, 08:20:26 AM »
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Packing Material?
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Offline stew71

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #470 on: October 24, 2014, 10:23:09 AM »
More likely the stuffing from a pet toy. Our lab ripped one open....once. We're still finding those fecking little beads.
With enough thrust, a pig flies just fine.

Online bedlamite

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #471 on: October 24, 2014, 09:46:07 PM »
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A plan is just a list of things that doesn't happen.

Offline Cablebandit

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #472 on: October 30, 2014, 08:02:24 AM »
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Online Papa Lazarou

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #473 on: October 30, 2014, 11:18:32 AM »
Out.
Putting the laughter back into manslaughter

Online MrsCablebandit

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #474 on: October 30, 2014, 11:46:05 AM »
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OUT.  :lol:
I used to make a bigger impression.

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Offline Jet-A-Pumper

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #475 on: October 31, 2014, 01:05:24 PM »
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Qapla'!

Online coho

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #476 on: November 12, 2014, 03:09:31 PM »
If it weren't for the therapeutic properties of the occasional off-camber decreasing radius downhill right-hander I'd almost certainly go completely sane.

"I like the beverages."  -CLAY

Offline rgbeard

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #477 on: November 13, 2014, 09:15:02 PM »
Sit on My Face
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Online bedlamite

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #478 on: November 15, 2014, 06:32:31 PM »
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A plan is just a list of things that doesn't happen.

Offline Jet-A-Pumper

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #479 on: November 16, 2014, 12:06:50 PM »
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Qapla'!

Online bedlamite

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #480 on: November 20, 2014, 12:21:24 PM »
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A plan is just a list of things that doesn't happen.

Online bedlamite

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #481 on: November 20, 2014, 01:52:29 PM »
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A plan is just a list of things that doesn't happen.

Offline Nodaclu

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #482 on: November 20, 2014, 09:23:53 PM »
Most motorcycle problems are caused by the nut that connects the handlebars to the saddle...

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #483 on: November 22, 2014, 07:27:17 PM »
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"Most accidents happen when the meek meet the douchebags."  -Viffergyrl
"The wider the road, the worse the food." -Coho
Let's do some science.

Offline Cablebandit

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #484 on: November 26, 2014, 07:58:03 AM »
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Online bedlamite

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #485 on: December 10, 2014, 06:57:42 PM »
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A plan is just a list of things that doesn't happen.

Offline Cookie

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #486 on: December 10, 2014, 07:24:12 PM »
Oh my.
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― Frank Zappa

Offline Max Wedge

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #487 on: December 11, 2014, 06:34:18 AM »
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There is some amusing stuff there at lamebook.com.
You never see a motorcycle parked outside a psychiatrists' office.
Where am I?

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #488 on: December 11, 2014, 08:09:05 AM »
There is some amusing stuff there at lamebook.com.
Damm, blocked at work... 
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Offline Max Wedge

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #489 on: December 11, 2014, 09:04:56 AM »
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You never see a motorcycle parked outside a psychiatrists' office.
Where am I?

Offline Max Wedge

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #490 on: December 11, 2014, 09:31:38 AM »
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You never see a motorcycle parked outside a psychiatrists' office.
Where am I?

Offline Max Wedge

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #491 on: December 11, 2014, 10:30:16 AM »
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You never see a motorcycle parked outside a psychiatrists' office.
Where am I?

Offline Max Wedge

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #492 on: December 11, 2014, 12:10:45 PM »
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You never see a motorcycle parked outside a psychiatrists' office.
Where am I?

Offline bungie4

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #493 on: December 11, 2014, 03:35:14 PM »
-Steve
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Offline bungie4

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #494 on: December 11, 2014, 03:35:27 PM »
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OMFGHAHAHAHAHA!
-Steve
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Offline squeezer

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #495 on: December 11, 2014, 03:53:29 PM »
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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #496 on: December 11, 2014, 03:54:35 PM »
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Online coho

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #497 on: December 12, 2014, 04:22:36 PM »
If it weren't for the therapeutic properties of the occasional off-camber decreasing radius downhill right-hander I'd almost certainly go completely sane.

"I like the beverages."  -CLAY

Online jadziadax8

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #498 on: December 12, 2014, 04:34:50 PM »
A good chuckle on that one.


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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #499 on: December 16, 2014, 09:55:36 AM »
I'm going to hell. Best Amazon review EVAR.

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