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Author Topic: You laugh. You Lose.  (Read 387986 times)

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Offline I'm NOT Carl

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #200 on: February 28, 2014, 07:10:53 AM »
At least there was no tongue. :hurl: (And I think she _ate_ Taylor Swift  :o)

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Online Papa Lazarou

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #201 on: March 01, 2014, 11:19:06 AM »
http://www.amazon.co.uk/product-reviews/B00BTGMS0Y/ref=dp_top_cm_cr_acr_txt?ie=UTF8&showViewpoints=1

As a semi-professional nurse attending an Accident and Emergency ward in a large London hospital, I was constantly frustrated by the limitations of the technology we were using to treat patients.

As the economy turned towards recession and departmental funding started to be reduced, our managers started looking for ways to make cuts - at first it was small items: no coffee-making facilities in the kitchens; toilet rolls instead of swabs - that sort of thing.

Fortunately this little box saved the day - soon after the x-ray machine was dispensed with, one of our staff stumbled across it as they were sweeping up patient detritus in the waiting room. Coincidentally, he had just cut his finger on a discarded scalpel and gladly made use of them as quickly as he could.

To all our amazement, when he peeled off the plaster to show us the gory details, there was NO WOUND AT ALL. It wasn't long before we put two and two together; now we use these little beauties for everything! Broken leg? Stick on a plaster! Funny rash - slap it on! Annoying voices in your head telling you to kill and bury the dog in the back garden? place one of these on your forehead and they're a thing of the past.

They not only provide the user with breathable padding, but also lend a sense of one-ness with the universe.

And don't worry about the pack running out - we've treated over 40 patients tonight, but strangely only one plaster has gone.

This could be the answer to the problem of the NHS. Thanks Amazon!
Putting the laughter back into manslaughter

Online bedlamite

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #202 on: March 02, 2014, 05:51:18 PM »


I lost it at "covered in jell-o"
A plan is just a list of things that doesn't happen.

Offline mxvet57

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #203 on: March 02, 2014, 07:16:41 PM »
At the risk of encouraging him, I agree with Cookie.   "Bomber"

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Offline CLAY

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #204 on: March 02, 2014, 09:47:16 PM »
Hey!   :rave:    :mad: :angry: :bluduh:





















My cousin.    :bigsmile:
"Most accidents happen when the meek meet the douchebags."  -Viffergyrl
"The wider the road, the worse the food." -Coho
Let's do some science.

Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #205 on: March 03, 2014, 07:49:17 AM »
An old one, but still made me laugh.

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Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #206 on: March 03, 2014, 07:51:01 AM »
http://boingboing.net/2014/03/01/tsa-agents-propose-secondary-s.html

TSA agents demand bag-search to look for "Bitcoins"
Cory Doctorow at 11:00 am Sat, Mar 1, 2014

Davi Barker was flying from Manchester, NH when, he says, he was stopped by two men who identified themselves as "managers" for the TSA, who claimed they had seen Bitcoins in his baggage and wanted to be sure he wasn't transporting more than $10,000 worth. When he asked them what they thought a Bitcoin looked like, they allegedly said that it looked like a coin or a medallion. (via Hacker News)

Offline Justin

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #207 on: March 03, 2014, 01:14:59 PM »
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Online Papa Lazarou

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #208 on: March 03, 2014, 03:09:04 PM »
feckin cyclists.

 :rolf:
Putting the laughter back into manslaughter

Offline bomber

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #209 on: March 03, 2014, 04:46:36 PM »
so entirely out!
We had two bags of grass, 75 pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a saltshaker half-full of cocaine, a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers... Also, a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of beer, a pint of raw ether, and two dozen amyls. Not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get locked into a serious drug collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can.

Online Papa Lazarou

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #210 on: March 04, 2014, 03:11:34 AM »
The risks of picking up thrash metal bands from airports.

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Putting the laughter back into manslaughter

Online HipGnosis

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #211 on: March 04, 2014, 09:46:10 AM »
The risks of picking up thrash metal bands from airports.
One shouldn't assume... unless it's required for you to sleep at night.
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Offline Justin

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #212 on: March 04, 2014, 10:32:11 AM »
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Offline Justin

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #213 on: March 04, 2014, 11:33:12 AM »
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Offline Justin

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #214 on: March 05, 2014, 10:00:27 AM »
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Offline CLAY

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #215 on: March 07, 2014, 06:42:33 AM »
"Most accidents happen when the meek meet the douchebags."  -Viffergyrl
"The wider the road, the worse the food." -Coho
Let's do some science.

Offline JonS

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #216 on: March 07, 2014, 07:25:16 AM »
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You can't avoid aging, but you don't have to get old.

Online Papa Lazarou

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #217 on: March 09, 2014, 12:16:10 PM »
Putting the laughter back into manslaughter

Offline Rincewind

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #218 on: March 10, 2014, 11:20:36 AM »

Online Papa Lazarou

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #219 on: March 10, 2014, 01:26:54 PM »
Putting the laughter back into manslaughter

Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #220 on: March 10, 2014, 02:16:13 PM »
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Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #221 on: March 11, 2014, 11:09:42 AM »
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Online bedlamite

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #222 on: March 13, 2014, 08:44:59 PM »
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A plan is just a list of things that doesn't happen.

Offline squeezer

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #223 on: March 14, 2014, 09:26:34 AM »
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« Last Edit: March 14, 2014, 10:05:05 AM by squeezer »
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Offline Justin

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #224 on: March 14, 2014, 02:51:20 PM »
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Online Papa Lazarou

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #225 on: March 14, 2014, 03:11:24 PM »
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I still think this is the funniest thing on this page. BEWARE!! BEWARE!!
Putting the laughter back into manslaughter

Offline Justin

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #226 on: March 14, 2014, 03:18:57 PM »
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Online bedlamite

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #227 on: March 14, 2014, 09:19:34 PM »
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A plan is just a list of things that doesn't happen.

Online Cablebandit

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #228 on: March 17, 2014, 08:43:47 AM »
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Offline bomber

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #229 on: March 17, 2014, 02:02:04 PM »
^ groan . . . . .
We had two bags of grass, 75 pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a saltshaker half-full of cocaine, a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers... Also, a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of beer, a pint of raw ether, and two dozen amyls. Not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get locked into a serious drug collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can.

Online Papa Lazarou

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #230 on: March 17, 2014, 05:08:14 PM »
Putting the laughter back into manslaughter

Offline Veefer800canuck

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #231 on: March 17, 2014, 09:39:54 PM »
Wow.   ^^^^^^


Edit:
(Had to look that one up, apparently that's an A380 in the pic. Hoax.)
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Offline mxvet57

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #232 on: March 17, 2014, 10:42:47 PM »
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Is that Phteven?
At the risk of encouraging him, I agree with Cookie.   "Bomber"

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Offline Cookie

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #233 on: March 18, 2014, 04:06:45 AM »
“Government is the Entertainment division of the military-industrial complex.”

― Frank Zappa

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #234 on: March 18, 2014, 07:27:07 AM »
At least he spelled Steven with a PH.  :lol:

Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #235 on: March 18, 2014, 11:50:39 AM »
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Offline I'm NOT Carl

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #236 on: March 18, 2014, 12:24:09 PM »
Funnier would be what they thought they were getting :D

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Offline squeezer

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #237 on: March 18, 2014, 11:19:27 PM »
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Offline Scratch

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #238 on: March 19, 2014, 01:30:18 PM »
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Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #239 on: March 20, 2014, 07:29:05 AM »
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Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #240 on: April 03, 2014, 01:53:49 PM »
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Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #241 on: April 07, 2014, 08:13:00 AM »
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Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #242 on: April 07, 2014, 08:13:36 AM »
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Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #243 on: April 07, 2014, 08:14:08 AM »
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Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #244 on: April 07, 2014, 08:15:24 AM »
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Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #245 on: April 07, 2014, 08:16:41 AM »
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Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #246 on: April 07, 2014, 08:17:09 AM »
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Offline SuperHans

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #247 on: April 07, 2014, 08:17:46 AM »
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Offline squeezer

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #248 on: April 07, 2014, 08:32:28 AM »
A man with no sig

Offline stew71

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Re: You laugh. You Lose.
« Reply #249 on: April 07, 2014, 01:06:11 PM »
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With enough thrust, a pig flies just fine.